Helpless and scared

My dad might pass in hospice any day. I'm really struggling to accept it. It's been only one month since diagnosed aggressive cancer. And I've felt such an injustice that he could not get any treatment or chemo. They said it would have killed him sooner because he's so compromised as it is.

Life can be wonderful and magical. Yes. I'm very grateful. But then it makes you MAD because some things are just so unjust or unfair. I wish I could accept this experience he's going through 🙁And having PTSD already I don't know how high my anxiety will be when he leaves 🥺

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LaLumieri · 51-55, F

Please I hope you don't think I'm trying to tell you what to do. Everyone's situation is different I just wanted to share what has helped me. I was just telling you about my experience. And the things that I had looked into to brace myself for what was going to happen
I didn't want him leaving with fear and sadness in his presence. Sometimes when we lose someone we think of our sadness and our loss and although it is heartbreaking.... We sometimes forget in the chaos of the moment..
I hope this helps a little bit.. and if you prepare yourself you can really truly make a difference at the very end.
When we come into this world we come in through Joy and pain.
Each of us leaves through a different set of circumstances.... My father was not hooked up to many machines and did not have any distress in those last moments. I wish that you all were not going through this at all. But I do pray that whatever comes to pass it is peaceful. You can always cry later You will have plenty of time for tears.... This is something you can do for him and for you because later on when you think about these moments and trust me you will.... They sometimes rip you apart flashing through your mind.... I've always found comfort in knowing what I did in those moments and how I hopefully helped him to leave us peacefully , lovingly.