Trying hard not to spiral this time

So last year when our oldest boy was in the hospital I went into a very bad spiral. Joel of course was with his son and I was holding everything else down. I got so hyper focused on making sure everyone had what they needed, our oldest boy, Joel, our other 2 kids, his ex wife, grandma, my old puppy the hamster I didn't focus on me. I was just lost in this panic of trying to make sure they were all ok. I stopped eating. Didn't even think about. I ended up in the hospital the day after our oldest got released. I don't know how Joel handled it or why he didn't leave me.

So here we are with someone I care for very much in the hospital again. And I'm doing it again. I'm getting hyper focused on making sure he's ok and Star is ok and my family is okay, the hamster is ok, not the cat I don't care about him but I am eating. Because of something as simple as a post it note on the refrigerator and my OCD. I put everything on the note and hang it up. And I have to finish everything I hang up. So I have 3 Note that says protein shake and we've just added 3 that say protein bars.
During the week is when I struggle the most with eating because everything is so rushed and busy. The weekends are a lot better.

And it's working. I'm eating and drinking them. So there is no way I'm going to spiral out again. I may not be eating meals every day but at least I'm getting something from the bars and shakes