Anxious
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Pretty sure I have an eating disorder in progress

Or maybe not. Or maybe. Been like questioning it sometimes. Because at the moment it's only sometimes I do this.
I've been exercising a lot which isn't the main issue. I exercise an hour a day, with a break every two days because of my knees needing a break.

Weirdly enough I'm worried I'll gain weight a lot even with all the exercise and change in diet. Like it's strange so I guess that was one red flag.

Other red flag started because occasionlly if I eat too much I'll throw it all up. Saves me on calories sometimes if I end up going overboard. If I eat too much to where I feel sick it makes more sense just to vomit it all up instead of be uncomfortable or possibly vomit later anyway.

But it's sort of become a habit, so that's something that I'm working on stopping, plus the overeating. Because it seemed harmless really at first, but then it kind of has become at frequent maybe to once a week. So I'm slowly working my way down and out of the habit again. Plus my bf told me he doesn't like it when I do it.

I have also developed the ability to vomit quitely or secretly even if I'm at someone's house. And I always clean up after myself at least, so there's that. But I realize it's a bad habit to have so馃ゲ
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AntisocialTroll56-60, F
Bulimia? It fucks your teeth up and isn't a great idea.

I think you should talk to a professional about it before it does you too much damage.
Juvia18-21, F
@AntisocialTroll Yeah, Imma give it a few months and see if I can manage just getting it down while its not bad. Like just stop it and hopefully the compulsion dies down. To be fair it didn't seem bad. But all it took was once and then twice and now it's more of an urge to do it. So I'm hoping I can go back to normal on my own first and then if not then I'll go back to therapy.
AntisocialTroll56-60, F
@Juvia I personally think you'd be better off talking to someone sooner rather than later, it's not just about stopping the behaviours, it's about sorting out the underlying mental illness part of it.

The risk is that if you don't sort the mental health part, then as soon as you become particularly stressed or anxious you are likely to fall back into the same behaviour.

It can become almost like an addiction that is hellishly difficult to stop and it really does screw up your teeth and can give you permanent damage to your digestive system.

I know you're strong and likely feel you can deal with stopping the behaviours on your own but it's very important you deal with the underlying issue too.