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Is she not interested....?

Hi, I met someone at work who comes in regularly and we've been chatting it up for about a month or so. Well, yesterday I mustered up the courage to ask her out for coffee and she agreed. I gave her my number and she texted me the next hour, which I thought were some pretty big green flags. But the conversation we had was..... well, pretty dry. I was the one asking her questions for like, 90% of the time and her schedule seems to be hectic, saying if Thursday or Friday doesn’t work for her it might need to wait until next week. Then we talked about our pets + how we unwind before the conversation sort of just.... stopped.

I know that this is only the first exchange, and she was probably tired from babysitting + subbing at work. But i cant help but feel like maybe she isnt interested. I'm used to people giving me subjefts to discuss when they're interested but she didn't really do any of that or make any effort to continue the conversation after talking about our comfort shows.

How should I approach this? Should I iust wait & see if she reaches out today or tomorrow?
TheMasterMan1
26-30, M
19 replies 194 views 4 days ago4 d
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poisonouscupcake · F
i would leave the conversation alone for now. some people are genuinely boring over text, it may unintentionally come off as disinterest. if there’s a nice rhythm in person, then i wouldn’t overthink the bad texting. to me, i wouldn’t agree to take someone’s number and go on a date if i wasn’t interested.
+ 3 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
ostfuidctyvm
I would just leave it and see if she gets in touch. Dry conversation is a red flag for more than just suspicions of lack of interest. It's also an indication that there is a lack of spark. You now need proof of interest because talking to yourself is just dull.
+ 2 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
FlowersInHerHair · 56-60, F
You said you asked questions 90% of the time? Did you leave her room to actually speak? Monopolizing the conversation and throwing out so many question can come across as an interrogation. You should probably let her make the next move but I wouldn’t sit by the phone waiting for it.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
TheMasterMan1 · 26-30, M
@FlowersInHerHair We didnt go on the date yet though? She's gonna (hopefully) get back to me on what day works best for her. Either tomorrow or possibly sometime next week according to her
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
FlowersInHerHair · 56-60, F
@TheMasterMan1 Ummm…you invited someone you are not friends with for coffee then talked about yourselves. That’s called a date. It’s also a safe first date. Short and sweet.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
TheMasterMan1 · 26-30, M
@FlowersInHerHair Well, we chatted for about 20 mins today before she ended the conversation short saying "her dog was demanding fetches" & still hasn't decided on a day, saying Monday may be feasible. So I'm thinking I'm probably just gonna cut my losses & wait for her to confirm at this point (or not, which seems most likely)
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 3 days ago3 d
AnonymousJSS · 22-25, F
She’s either anxious, just doesn’t like texting, she’s playing hard to get, or she’s not interested enough. Don’t text her for about a day or two, give her some space to miss you a bit. Then text her again. If she keeps being dry and doesn’t confirm on the coffee date then she’s not interested.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · 3 days ago3 d
TheMasterMan1 · 26-30, M
@AnonymousJSS That's the route I plan on going. If I dont hear anything by Monday or Tuesday then I have my answer.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 3 days ago3 d
MisterBander
No silly, you should tell her what you noticed first about her, what you like.

"You know when I first saw you, it was your hair that really got me interested, you have amazing hair"
"It was your smile that really got me interested in you, you were talking to someone else and when you smiled the room lit up"
"I love your style, hard working, beautiful, helpful, friendly, what is your secret to being so amazing?"

Maybe she thinks you are boring too.. she might be comparing you to her rodeo boyfriend from the past that she still loves and yawning.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
TheMasterMan1 · 26-30, M
@MisterBander Idk i feel like thats laying it on a little too hard. I might just give it some time & see if she gets back to me. If she doesnt, then I have my answer ig
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
MisterBander
@TheMasterMan1 All you can do is do your best, so if waiting for her to make a move is your best, then that is what you should do. ;)
Or you can go for it and maybe make a new friend and have some fun.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 3 days ago3 d
soulrespite ·
No…. Trust your gut. If I am into someone, I would find the time and energy to talk to him.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · 3 days ago3 d
TheMasterMan1 · 26-30, M
@soulrespite Yeah im thinking thats what im gonna do. We chatted for about 20 mins today before ending the conversation short & still hasn't decided on a day, saying Monday may be feasible. So I'm thinking I'm probably just gonna cut my losses & wait for her to confirm at this point (or not)
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · 3 days ago3 d
Baybreeze · 41-45, F
I'd Def just give it a little time... Maybe in text she's distracted with things in her home or life, but in person was engaging. I remember once I was texting with a guy he was always peppy and using exclamation etc. Then on the phone he was not like that at all lol !! He was dry and kinda monotone and not how he was online. So just give it a bit of time, hopefully you'll find a day together soon to have coffee 🍀
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F
Yes, wait.
Maybe she isn't much of a talker, too soon to know anything about her yet.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · 4 days ago4 d
 
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