When you are starting to date someone...

Do you think of what you may offer them? I get panicked because I fear my anxiety (generalized) will be a deal breaker for them in the short run. I overlook the traits I DO have or offer. But I overlook them because then I feel arrogant if I say to myself, I can offer this or that ( patience, compassion etc) Do you ever ponder these issues while looking for love? Does acknowledging your traits make you feel confident?

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Ontheroad · M

My mantra: Don't overthink dating. Don't make it over complicated. Don't have expectations. Leave your anxieties at home and have fun.

Personally I think the worst thing to do is to start out looking for "the one". Just be you and if you are, your date will let you know if what you are offering is enough for him/her.

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Mindful · 56-60, F

@Ontheroad may you find your fellow comfort zone in real life!

Ontheroad · M

@Mindful I as a matter of fact, do. SW is just a fun past time.

Mindful · 56-60, F

@Ontheroad that’s great to hear! Congrats. SW definitely Keeps me more than company when I’m feelin alone and don’t want to “burden” others. Here I can share my very worst and still feel acceptance (sometimes rejection) and love.

Muthafukajones · 46-50, M

I’ve often wondered what a particular woman sees in me

Mindful · 56-60, F

Ditto. I mean a certain man. But I don’t know what certain means to you. It could mean something different to me. But I too will wonder why me?@Muthafukajones

CestManan · 46-50, F

If I were to seek a relationship (unlikely at this point in my life) but my question would be, "What do I get out of this?"

Relationships are nothing but hassle. Yeah for the first couple months you get to have awesome sex and all the honeymoon stuff but after that things just kind of sputter out anyways.

Mindful · 56-60, F

@CestManan lol lol lol I understand. Lol. I’m soooo lucky in that aspect! I have someone who happens to love me as I am. and isn’t hardly any trouble. But he is a workaholic. So …. He lets me flirt IF I so choose. So, I date Netflix on the side.

JoyfulSilence · 46-50, M

I worry some of my quirks will turn them away.

My apartment is a little cluttered, as well as my mind at times.

I never answer my phone. Instead, I let people leave a message and then call back.

I am usually only in my underwear when at home.

Etc.

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Mindful · 56-60, F

@MalteseFalconPunch I think it’s important to see yourself as you truly are. When you can just be yourself… the right person will gravitate toward you.

SledgeHammer · 46-50, M

I had been on a dates with women expressing those feeling as you do..

So to get it out of the way... a kiss at the begining of the date will pretty much answer so much and mostly helps relax.

LadyJ · F

Its because of my anxiety i will avoid relationships..better off without all the hassle

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