I Want to Know Your Addiction

I just lost another $800 gambling this week and it is really crimping my style. I paid rent but it leaves my other habits of drinking and other drugs at a point where I can't afford to get along for the next two weeks. I was going to get items out of the pawn shop but now that is out of the question. I have to take one step at a time and taking a day off work was the first step. I lose a day's pay but I would spend it anyway. My addictions are part of a core dysfunction that is tangled and convoluted. Being an alcoholic and a drug taking participant exacerbates this immensely.

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Coralmist · 41-45, F

Know that the money and gambling , drugs etc are using YOU🙁 It’s like addiction says “you can’t live without me” and it’s FALSE ..it’s maybe from a need to fill a void or a way to evade feelings...abuse from past etc. But I know it doesn’t CARE about you, it’s taking from you😢 YOUR TRUE self is always enough.. we don’t need drugs or more money or more anything to feel joy, we need OUR OWN LOVE and compassion to feel joy, IMO 🌸🍀🍃

atlantic59 · 61-69, M

@Coralmist that is a fact, about it not caring. Like Willie Nelson talking about how eventually the bottle drinks from you. Thanks for your understanding support. I don't like to ask for help which is what the addiction therapies encourage. Ego keeps it all going 'round for us addicts, - I understand that little perpetual voice in the head is a problem. No, we don't need anything outside of ourself. We are enough if we only realize it. Being in bad relationships don't help but I probably bring them on because of my weakness...