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I Know Bad Relationships Change People

Have you ever blamed someone of bringing out all the worst in you? Have you been in a relationship so bad that you think it has took everything that's bright and shiny from your life? I'm not even sure if I have been in those kinds of relationship. All I know is that I'm not utterly glad about how my current relationship is going.

I don't want to blame my partner of what is happening in my life right now. Actually, I don't want to blame anyone of anything that's happening to me. I believe that being happy or sad is all up to me. I take full credit of how my life is going. It's my fault that I'm feeling this way because I let a certain event affect me so much that it made me sad and dysfunctional.

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SW-User

I was in a fucked up relationship for five years up until late last year, she fucked with my head and psychologically abused me, and after breaking up with her I had a fear of falling in love again and felt doomed to be alone forever but I don’t blame her, I blamed myself for allowing it to happen and believed all the degrading stuff she said to me and allowing it to kill my self esteem.
I have recently met someone new and just started a new relationship, and she has been quite patient with me and completely understood my vulnerability, not only I am genuinely happy with my new girl but I feel really safe with her too.

Buckbeak · 31-35, F

@SW-User Good for you. Congratulations for overcoming a bad relationship. Cheers to that awesome lady. She will be so blessed for putting a smile on your face.

Intissima · F

I agree. I sometimes forget that I’m in control of my own happiness. If I’m not happy then I should do something about it....

Buckbeak · 31-35, F

@Intissima I greatly appreciate this website. It gives me hope and sensible people to talk to and share my problems with. I appreciate your agreement with my thoughts and opinions regarding this matter. We're just mere mortals and we tend to forget the things that are within our control due to emotional instability that is usually caused by heartbreaks. All we can do is stand up after a fall and just go on living our life again.

Vivaci

Don't let it get to you... Try to move on to better things. It's okay if things or people didn't turn out as you expected it to be. 🤗

Buckbeak · 31-35, F

@Vivaci Such helpful words. Thank you. ❤️

Vivaci

@Buckbeak Warm hugs....

I believe one should learn from these mistakes and no matter what happens, try not to repeat them. That's the only way to experiencing better things in life. 😌🤗

SoFine · 46-50, F

We all get triggered by current events that reminds us of previous hurts.
Thst saying "are you upset for the reason that you think you are or its a reminder of a similar old hurt".

That "Special" person will trigger one, not with intent yet they will.

Yes, how long we stay upset for, that's in our control, how long, we stay a victim is up to each one.

Yip, our own happiness is our own life job. (People will upset us, it's how long we stay there is our own doing)

To be
To be happy for no reason than to be happy.

Keepitsimple · 51-55, F

I actually have had somebody bring out the worst in me and then some. It was like a match and gasoline and burning down the town bad toxic relationship. One I never want to endure again.

Buckbeak · 31-35, F

@Keepitsimple This man is the father of my daughter. This relationship has brought out all the worst that I have in my heart and mind. But still, I stay by his side and I keep asking him to stay no matter how many times I tell him to go away. The reason is that I take my immaturity as the culprit to my poor decision making and I just can't bear to let my family, especially my daughter, to be affected greatly just because of it.

Problems are made by two people not agreeing with each other. That's why we are both to blame of our disagreement. We talk it out and work it out. Because the truth is, I do love him. And I have to endure because being in a relationship requires understanding and resolution. I don't know if what I'm doing is right, but I think that we can stay together as long as there is still love

SW-User

My past relationships have made me bitter. I don't know if I'll ever date again.

Buckbeak · 31-35, F

@SW-User Don't let that person ruin everything that's good in life.

SW-User

@Buckbeak It's a bit too late for that.

bijouxbroussard · F

No, because I always understood that. I never stayed in any situation where I was consistently unhappy, especially if there was no way to work through things.

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