Embarrassing & Funny
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How do I tell my mom she’s embarrassing me?

I’m sure all of you can relate to this somewhat, I know all parents can be embarrassing from time to time but one thing my mom does really makes it difficult for me to have people over. In the middle of the kitchen, hanging on the wall is a wooden paddle my mom used to use on me when I was a kid. I’m a senior in high school now so it’s obviously not in use anymore but my mom still chooses to hang it up on full display. I have no resentment towards my mom for how she disciplined me but leaving it up on the wall is pretty annoying. A couple weeks ago for instance I invited a girl over who I like and while we were hanging out she couldn’t help but notice it. You could try to pass it off as a cooking utensil but the holes in it pretty much give it away. Naturally she asked me about it and my mom was in the room so this struck up a conversation that was extremely uncomfortable for me. I don’t think my mom thinks it’s a big deal and I don’t want to hurt her feelings but it does make me hesitate to invite people over. How should I bring this up to my mom?
utfan
22-25, M
15 replies 47 views Dec 8, 2019
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Edited: 4 yrs ago
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Spoiledbrat · F Best Comment
It sounds like your mom is projecting her own experiences, with her parents perhaps. That [/i]would[/i] be embarrassing. How you get punished by your parents is private. I agree 100 percent. Pull up some articles on parenting and have intelligent conversation with your mom. Putting a paddle on the wall is a reminder of every time she disapproves of you.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019 · Edited: 4 yrs ago
utfan · 22-25, M
@Spoiledbrat I’ll do that thanks for the advice
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
Johnblackthorn · 56-60, M
I'd like to give you some advice on this but I'm too busy laughing on the inside at your discomfort to want to help.
no seriously, just let her know how you feel or even show her this post, the "no resentment" bit will buy some mileage and shows a fair bit of maturity.
However if it goes tits up write about it here because it is bound to be as equally funny.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
utfan · 22-25, M
@Johnblackthorn lmaoo im glad you find it funny I’ll give an update after i talk to her
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
rckt148 · 61-69, M
You can explain that is why you have respect and manners a lot of young people today lack ,you were disciplined and it didn't kill you ,it served as a reminder.
If I hid everything I was beat with there would not be a cord on a lamp ,extension cord or tree in the yard ,wire coat hangers ,metal fly swatter
If it caused pain ,my Mom was an expert with it .
I used a switch ,but only on the rear through clothing and no where else .
My kids rarely got punished ,they were taught to mind early and reminded I didn't make threats when I got full custody of them .
You could talk to her and ask if it could be put in a less obvious place ,
But as I told my Dad and my kids have all told me .
I probably could have used more then I got ,but Mom was a different story .
She is how I know the difference from punishment verses abuse ,
Today ,Mom would be in jail never allowed to see her kids unsupervised again .
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
BoobooSnafu
You say she doesn't use it any more right?

Throw the bastard thing out!... Easy

Or, go all Yzma on it 😊
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
utfan · 22-25, M
@BoobooSnafu I think this the route I’m gonna end up taking 😂
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
BoobooSnafu
@utfan hehe... Honestly,,, all funny put aside.. This issue has to be resolved.
You can confront her about it... I domt know your mother's personality - but the fact that it's still on the wall is.... Weird.
It's - psychological.

If she was willing to paddle you repeatedly asap punishment - my doubt towards her being soft and epathetic... Is strong.

If I was to get all "psychology major"
On you - "It's tjere on the wall as a subliminal symbol of her control over you."

I'm a mum, and I taught my children- hopefully - to be able to manage their own decisions and grow into adults (my daughter is nearly 20 now). And I try to remind myself she is now an adult - amd needs yo he treated as such.

I agree _ having that on the wall is.... Demeaning.

IMHO🤷‍♀️

And if I was in your position - i'd just quietly remove it on the day the trashmen come...
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019 · Edited: 4 yrs ago
utfan · 22-25, M
@BoobooSnafu thanks I really appreciate all the advice. I think my mom would probably understand if I talked to her about it but I do agree that she keeps it up there to kinda keep me in my place
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 9, 2019
SW-User
Maybe you're embarrassing her. Ever thought about that?
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
utfan · 22-25, M
@SW-User lmao wym?
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
yeronlyman · 51-55, M
“Mum you’re embarrassing me, I
Mean it sincerely”
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
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GerOttman · 61-69, M
Well there's two ways you can go with this. Play it straight, hey this happened, I'm over it. Or amp it up, next time it comes up make it that you were abused and you're damaged and you'll never forgive the cruel injustice! Might change her mind!!
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
TexasGrandpa · 61-69, M
Or tell the gf you'll use it on her if she doesn't behave.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Dec 8, 2019
 
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