I Am An Addict

Dan that is brave of you to share this ,
I was a real drunk ,case of long necks in the fridge every night when I got home ,we drank a 12 pack from around noon until we knocked off ,normally around 5 ,then a 12 pack for the ride home
since my partner nor I had licence due to DWI's my Uncle was our ride
He got the jobs ,put my partner and I on the job in the morning ,show up and take us to lunch ,quick stop at the beer store ,fill the water keg with Ice and beer and back to work
On the way home ,my uncle ,my partner and I polished off a 12 pack ,
I walk in the door go to the fridge and grab a long neck and go to my den for bong hits ,pain meds and shot of JD
When the case was gone ,I soon passed out ,in my den ,my wife longing for me to just once in a while come to bed with her ,but I know alcohol breath when you are not drinking stinks ,,I knew what I was doing ,I was staying out of her face ..and I was to drunk to make my gorgeous wife happy anyway .

When I played in clubs ,they offered me or my band a tab ,,we tried that
we owed the bar more then we made ,,normally $400,00 a night ,,either for just me and my one man show ,or a 4 piece band
So that couldn't keep being the deal ,playing to get drunk
we got that playing for keg parties
So ,,my deal included free drinks ,for each of us and a guest and if the club served food ,free food too (I can chow down when I have a drunk on
I played one club for 10 months ,every weekend ,,I did a solo act and they served food ,

I had such a following I packed the place to capacity every weekend
So now that everyone know the name "Rick"
I went to the bigger clubs ,one had 3 stages ,3 bands and a revolving bar in each auditorium ,very nice place to play .

At first they put me at the entrance under a light on the wall ..pin ball machines and pool tables to each side of me ,,I was the juke box
People walking in front of me as I played ,shouting and cheering over pool games ,,I felt they thought I was a Joke

As soon as the people that came to hear me flooded the place ,it was clear they parked me in the wrong place ,they moved me from a smaller stage at first then finally the main stage
I nor my wife drank while I preformed
but from closing until 5 am ,when the cops did shift change (now I was driving a bigger truck packed with music equipment .and no licence
getting stopped drinking ,and no licence because of a DWI was not part of my plan (I have to say I was blessed ,I played there for 2 yrs and not even a close call as to being stopped .

I made up for lost time and it was free and anything I wanted
I tried shots of high dollar alcohols I never heard of ,it was the owners intent every weekend to drink me under the table ,it never happened
But as you have read I assume in some of my posts ,I developed a spur in my shoulder that paralyzed my arm
My building mansions in the day and musician at night slammed to a halt
and by now my habit was far worse ,all the money I made went to better equipment and alcohol and drugs ,now I can't even play

The wife left me and I gave her everything ,I was a destroyed man
My Uncle betrayed me .my partner didn't want me around his company crying over my loss so he ran me off ,,I was friendless and homeless
But a guy I had promised to kill said God spoke to him ,and told him to save me ,I was about to commit suicide ,I was to scared to go on ,
I was dragged to a church kicking and screaming
I walked in (dragged in more like it )an addict and a drunk ,,walked out sober as a Judge ,that was over 25 yrs ago .I am still sober
I have never had the desire to drink or drug again ,,and not one day of withdraw
Instantly God healed me ,,my proof (for me ) He was real
I know (or I believe from a few short conversations ,and the wonderful lady we both love (Grace ) you know my Boss too
He can heal you ,He is no respecter of persons ,,if He did it for me
He can do it for you too

I would say that would technically be an "alcoholic", as when I think of "addict", I think drugs. But alcohol is a drug, and the 12-step-meetings are basically interchangeable. And alcohol is probably worse than heroin when it comes to withdrawals, if you get physically addicted. Alcohol and benzos are the only drugs you can die from in withdrawal--i.e., possibility of dying when you stop.

Just a small matter of semantics. Err. I mean... Quit trying to steal my street cred by calling yourself an addict!

Just kidding.

As for your coping mechanism, it depends on what exercises you're doing. (I've been training and studying training for the past 3-4 years: I know a decent bit about fitness). If you're doing low-intensity exercise, you can do that all day long. Though I wouldn't recommend it.

If you're doing high intensity exercise, yeah, your body might need some rest. Recovery is where strength and endurance are grown. Exercise breaks your body down--which may not be the best thing for you if you're pushing it hard, when your body is fighting a hard battle, already. Light-moderate exercise is great, but heavy could be negative, if your body is stressed.

Depending on your level of fitness, you could enter overtraining territory. Doing high intensity exercise breaks down your immune system. It comes back stronger, but exercise is a stress to your body. A [b]needed stress[/b], but it's still about [i]how much[/i] stress is good and how much is bad.

You could also get rhabdomyolysis--commonly known as rabdo--f you work your body too hard. And that's a trip to the hospital and possible death. Tearing up the muscles can release toxins into the blood. Basically, yes, you can literally kill your muscles, and their corpse floods through your body doing serious damage to the rest of it. Bodybuilder's get it sometimes, but you REALLY have to stress your body beyond its limits, generally, for that to happen.

If you're sore one day though, try to work a different body part. You were doing push ups, okay, try pull ups. If you can't do a pull up, jump up to a bar (say at a park, if you don't have a gym membership), then slowly let yourself down. You can do inverted rows on a bar, as well, pulling yourself up to the bar, if you can't do full pull ups.

Bodyweight squats, jogging, stuff like that. Even just walking would be profoundly healthy, and you can do that all day long. I used to go for long walks while I was in withdrawal from morphine. It sucked, but it also helped a lot.

This is a tactic called a bro split in bodybuilding, but the same concept applies to whatever your goals are. If one part is sore, work a different part.

Good luck, bro. Life sucks clean, but it sucks a lot worse high/drunk. Consider a 12-step, with people who know what it's like. It can help.

Don’t be ashamed, it’s brave to post 🤗😘

No, you can't "destroy" your muscles unless you exercise to a mindless degree. You sure can cause injuries to them, though.

Many, many people have consumed alcohol more than even [i]they[/i] think they should, of course. I don't think you need feel any shame, for admitting it.

Try a 12 step,program. It worked for me. I have been sober 20 yrs

This is a great post because you've shown how easy it is for some people to get caught up with alcohol or drugs etc, but you've also made a huge effort in overcoming it. Especially replacing it with exercise which is a great substitute and will benefit you for all the right reasons. Thanks for sharing and keep up the good work.

I love this post!! You are not alone. I was addicted to alcohol for years. I started on the easy stuff, then I began drinking vodka on a regular basis. I turned my life upside down. I attempted suicide quite a few times. But, finally I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. I got help also on several occasions. I am now sober for almost 13 years. It's been rough though. But, time heals all wounds. I do care about what your going through. I'm here!!!🤗