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Is it normal to have siblings who don't talk to you?

To never go out with them?
To never have a conversation?

To be practically strangers?

Fauxmyope2 · 26-30, F

My sister died in March. I would give anything to talk with her. I passed a restaurant that she liked today and for the briefest moment, I thought about reaching out to her, only to quickly remember that she is dead.

Is it weird that I still talk to her and my mother when I am alone? Obviously, I hear no answers. It just comforts me.

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Fauxmyope2 · 26-30, F

@iamnikki Thank you!

PoetryNEmotion · F

@Fauxmyope2 *softly* I still talk to my mom. I say her name out loud. I tell her how I feel from my heart. Not weird at all. I know she hears me. My dad too. If it helps your heart, do not fret. It is good and kind and loving.

Fauxmyope2 · 26-30, F

@PoetryNEmotion Thank you. 🤗

SW-User

I never thought it was, but I'm thinking maybe sadly it is

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@SW-User meanwhile, my other siblings talk to each other. My whole family is weird honestly

SW-User

@iamnikki I'm the odd one out in my family. It's my husband they disapprove of . I live my life.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@SW-User why is that

curiosi · 61-69, F

I am the black sheep of the family. None of them like me. In this case it is one of the black sheep knows truths that the family refuses to accept.

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cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

@RogueLoner oh yeah and I got tired of that crap. It’s always on their terms. With my youngest sister she wouldn’t come around for 6 months or give me the bum’s rush if I called her. But any time she needed something she’d be right on my doorstep. The other one the same way. One time she had snubbed me & my daughter for a year & I never knew why, it hurt my daughter because her cousins were close in age to her & then one day called me up to invite my daughter to her daughter’s sleep-over for her birthday. So I brought her over. The day after she came back home my sister called me up and said “Oh, by the way Kandi has head lice.”. I think she already knew she had it before she called me up. Apparently she was crawling with them & was hard to ignore that. She has a mean streak a mile wide. Cost me money on my limited budget & a lot of work to treat for those & wash everything my daughter had or slept on.

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cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

@RogueLoner Oh you are so fortunate that such a busy man as he is would bless you with a few minutes of his time even if it was just to bitch about his life problems. 😂

kodiac · 22-25, M

I think it's sad ,you are connected even if they don't acknowledge you.When that connection isn't there the world can be a lonely place .To be able to say that's my sister or brother or parent is something people take for granted ,it connects people to life .Having no living family is the true meaning of lonliness because you have no connection .

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iamnikki · 31-35, F

@kodiac NONE of my family calls me. We dont go anywhere or do anything, even before covid

kodiac · 22-25, M

@iamnikki That sucks even more than not having them .

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@kodiac it does, since there is an alternative...actually BEING and activing like a FAMILY

PoetryNEmotion · F

Seems so. I have 4 brothers, one half-sister and one younger sister. I only talk to my next oldest brother who wished for me regularly. I ask about my sisters. After my dad and mom died, everyone parted ways. The way my brothers except the one treated my mother was beyond words. Who does that to their mother? Scumbags. I don't miss them not one single bit. I am not about money. I am about hearts and caring and love. I think you have to work at staying in touch if that is what you want. If they are good. So work on it if you wish.

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iamnikki · 31-35, F

@PoetryNEmotion try again? I think part of it is that they are twins. They've been together their whole lives. Why let me in? That's probably their thoughts. Probably dont want me to get in-between their relationship somehow. I think they are also jealous. But we have the same parents, grew up in the same house and had the same opportunities

PoetryNEmotion · F

@iamnikki Twins are different. You cannot be a part of twins. Still, you are siblings. Why didn't your parents help? Twins are like two souls created together. Move forward, Nikki.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@PoetryNEmotion why can't i be a part of twins?
Are you saying I can't have a relationship with them because they are twins? I don't know why they didn't help

greenmountaingal · 70-79, F

It's "normal" in some families. Sorry it's "normal" in yours.

Many families are in total denial about anything bad that happened in that family. And they greatly resent the truth teller in the family. They can get away with lying, been covering up stuff for years, so why does somebody have to insist on the truth?! At least, that's how they see it.

DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F

When we lived in the same town, my brother and I would go out to lunch maybe once every 3 months. But now we live in separate states and never see each other. He will text me once in a while to check on me, but that's it. We have our own separate lives.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@DearAmbellina2113 at least y'all went out every 3 months

cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

Not normal but with some families that’s the way it is. My two sisters and I live within 2 miles of one another & we never go around each other. I was helping one out last decade & she turned on me gaslighting me because I refused to drive her to the casino. That’s when it ended with me.

Dusty101 · F

I always hung out with my brothers, we always went to music festivals together. I'm my brothers best friend.
Unfortunately my oldest brother passed away! Devastating!
I've cousins I don't want to be in contact with!

SW-User

Not sure how normal it is, I do not speak with my sibling, they are toxic and draining to me and I need my energy for other things ❤️

SubstantialKick · 36-40, M

I haven't really talked to my brothers much since they moved out months ago. As far as hanging out with them goes...well there is this recommended thing called social distancing that kind of prevents us from doing that 🤷🏾‍♂️. If not for the current health situation I am sure that we would be hanging out a lot more often.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@SubstantialKick as I responded to someone else, we didn't go out pre-covid either so .

Piper · 61-69, F

Not sure how normal it is, but I know it's not exactly unusual.

Moonpenny · F

Yes....you can't choose your family 🤷🏼‍♀️

Sroonaka616 · 31-35, M

I only talk to my brother when I have to. I probably won't miss him if he disappeared from my life. It just that we are living very different lives. He is someone who I probably won't hang out with if it wasn't for the fact that we are related to each other.

wildbill83 · 41-45, M

🤷‍♂️ my sister ostracized herself from family and I to to hang around a bunch of deadbeats; so basically she only comes around when she wants something; even her daughters have little to do with her...

texasdaddydom · 56-60, M

do you live with them? after first leaving home went a few years with only maybe calling on birthdays etc

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texasdaddydom · 56-60, M

@iamnikki I think maybe I'm wrong but I think that the norman Rockwell concept of family is rare. at least among my friends.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@texasdaddydom norman rockwell concept🤔
Perfect family concept I'm guessing?

texasdaddydom · 56-60, M

@iamnikki yes artist did family illustrations esp holidays for the new yorker for years

HootyTheNightOwl

Lol... It is in my family... my brother blocked me on Facebook and my sister and I only fight when we are together - so it's probably better this way.

SW-User

I’m sure it is normal; I have a friend who is estranged from his sister. I can’t imagine it though. I’ve always been close with my three siblings.

SW-User

Pretty normal yeah , especially if you didn’t spend much time together when kids/teens due to age differences

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@SW-User ya that's another issue

thepreposterouspanda · 36-40, M

That's how me and my youngest brother are. Maybe we'll be closer as we get older, but certainly haven't been thus far. 🤷‍♂️

SW-User

I'm not sure it's "normal" but it happens quite frequently. If you can't change the situation, the best way to handle it is to create your own siblings with through solid friendships. I don't have any sisters yet I have a couple of friends that I consider to be my sisters, we're that close.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@SW-User yes but most people have siblings of their own so I feel like that will never happen

eMortal · M

Issues of modern families.

lovelywarpedlemon

these days it's quite normal.

ExperienceDLT · M

Its normal for me I have 5 siblings and none of them speak to me

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@ExperienceDLT why, what happened?

ExperienceDLT · M

@iamnikki they are from my moms first marriage so for whatever reason they hate me

Ihopetolivehappily · M

It's depends on what you perceive as normal.

Muthafukajones · 46-50, M

It happens. It’s unfortunate.

SkeetSkeet · 100+, F

I remember my teacher saying when I was younger that he hadn't talked to his sister for 15 years. I thought it was the saddest thing ever. I told my brother that a couple months ago that was going to be us. He rarely ever answers my calls or texts. If we do make plans he always cancels them. We maybe see each other once a month for dinner at my mom's. I've just learned to appreciate the little time we have together 🤷

ImperialAerosolKidFromEP · 51-55, M

No, not normal, but far from unusual

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