Find it very difficult to communicate at work

You're not a failure, don't loose perspective. But if things are that hard, you might need to move on.
I'm sorry you're facing this now.
What are your plans overall?

You can do it.

Be the decisive person.

That is also in you.

You are always hard on yourself

Maybe you need to clear your role, responsibilities, priorities and the authorities with your senior/boss.

quit and move.

✌