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Pregnant and getting a lot of pressure from in laws to get together.. saying no until baby is born. Selfish?

I’m 20 weeks pregnant and already huge and going to bed early every night because I’m so exhausted. I have high blood pressure already and headaches..I’m at a bit of a loss because I have my husbands family who is wanting to plan family gatherings especially in a month fir Easter. I was completely honest and said I’m hanging on for the weekends for dear life that I probably won’t be attending any family events until after the baby is born. My sister in law responded with are you really going to be a hermit the rest of your pregnancy and I said yes it just takes a lot out of me and because of my work schedule I truly cherish anytime I have to rest (vs spending a 4 hour outing with them, I mean common really?).. am I being selfish I mean isn’t it understandable? Obviously I know Covid is getting better so it’s not the main reason but also in the back of my mind. I just would rather not go anywhere or see anyone until the pregnancy is over with. My husband completely understands and said it’s understandable. He supports me so much. Anyone have any advice? Is it selfish on my part?
TexChik · F Best Comment
That is the prudent thing to do , because of covid, at this moment. People are still catching it. That wouldnt be a good scenario for you to navigate . As long as your husband understands that is great. You dont feel good and are tired. Are any of them offering to come over and clean your house, do the laundry, and basically help out because your pregnancy has medical complications?

I would tell them to go pound sand and that they should stop before it damages your relationship with them.
Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F
@TexChik you’re answers are my favorite 😂 said in a true southern fashion. We live in Fort Worth what part are you in? No you’re right they haven’t offered anything or like to come here or anything and live an hour away in North Dallas. If they press on I probably will tell them to go pound sand 🥰 thanks for making me feel so much better
TexChik · F
@Brassm0nk3y Oh I live in Frisco. Before Covid we would hit Joe T's, Billy Bob's...and then stay in a local hotel for a fun date night.

You and baby come first. They should respect that and that you know best. Let them fuss. They are not the ones going through this pregnancy.
VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M
Get the rest you need and screw the in-laws. They're being selfish asking things if you when you can't because you're so tired. Rest as much as you can.
Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F
Thank you for making me feel so much better about it 🥰@VirginMatchmaker
VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M
@Brassm0nk3y you're welcome
walabby · 61-69, M
Not selfish at all. You need to give your child the best chance at life by looking after yourself. Don't expect to be doing much for the 6 weeks after the birth, either!
Best of luck..
SW-User
The art of compromise: Tell them they can travel and spend a few hours with you on a day of your choosing, and that they shouldn't expect you to serve them.
pregnant women have the highest rate of infection & it's not worth your's or your baby's life.
ineedadrink · 51-55, M
You do what you gotta do! They should stifle themselves because you aren't the least bit selfish.
nikki34 · 36-40, F
its not selfish
Mrsbetweenfatandfit · 26-30, F
I understand both sides.

Having a loved one pregnant is a really exciting thing. Especially with this last year being such a lonely, boring, dreary one I understand family wanting to spend time together & see how you’re progressing etc. I think it’s likely coming from a place of happiness & love. However I don’t think they are considering your energy/ well being enough. I’m pregnant as well & I only just started feeling more myself. My husbands family arrives next week for a visit & we will share the pregnancy news. They live far so this week is the only part they will be able to be a part of. Sometimes being around people we love can actually give our mood a boost. Absolutely do whatever you feel is best for yourself. Rest is very important & you know what you need. I hope you feel better soon & maybe everyone can have some time together without draining you. 🌻💗😇

 
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