You find yourself attracted to a co-worker but company rules forbid any romance. What would you do ?
I did have this situation, a long time ago. My son was probably 11 or 12. I worked within easy walking distance of my home so that my son could walk easily to get me if he needed me. A male coworker had the same last name, and he was using that to try to further a close acquaintance. He refused to wear deodorant, so his pheromones were beyond thick.
We were co-managers at the time, and he and I were closing that day. The lights were out, and I admit...he smelled like...hmmm. Can't describe it. And he kept trying to move closer to me as we were working. I did like the smell. 🤣 It was a dangerous situation for me, as a married woman with an abusive husband.
The following day, I found an antique New Years noisemaker, (I had a small collection), and I put it in the pocket of my smock. Then I made sure the owner's wife saw it, and I told her that I would take it out and make noise with it if my coworker kept crowding up against me.
Within a week he had his own store in Dartmouth, and I never had to see him again...🤣. Sometimes you just have to speak up.
We were co-managers at the time, and he and I were closing that day. The lights were out, and I admit...he smelled like...hmmm. Can't describe it. And he kept trying to move closer to me as we were working. I did like the smell. 🤣 It was a dangerous situation for me, as a married woman with an abusive husband.
The following day, I found an antique New Years noisemaker, (I had a small collection), and I put it in the pocket of my smock. Then I made sure the owner's wife saw it, and I told her that I would take it out and make noise with it if my coworker kept crowding up against me.
Within a week he had his own store in Dartmouth, and I never had to see him again...🤣. Sometimes you just have to speak up.
BigAssLeech · 31-35, M
Nimbus · M
@BigAssLeech @BigAssLeech Good point!
NiftyWhite · 46-50, F
@BigAssLeech Or if you’re fighting everyone knows. If you break up you have to tell everyone. i’ve dated a coworker and because he was a jerk it was miserable everyday.
BigAssLeech · 31-35, M
@NiftyWhite Same here. Everyone finding out really adds another level of hell to the situation.
NankerPhelge · 61-69, M
smiler2012 · 61-69
@NankerPhelge well you cannot and even in the workplace it is draconian and would be difficult to implement legally
Nimbus · M
@NankerPhelge It happens.
cherokeepatti · 61-69, F
At the job I retired from we had a new manager and she made a rule that if anyone started dating or whatever they were to come to her and inform her. (Probably so they could be put in two different areas where they wouldn’t distract each other). I’m kind of thinking that nobody ever did tell her, they just got sneakier about it and you could tell how they were looking at each other that something was going on.
cherokeepatti · 61-69, F
@Nimbus It was the leads and regular employees that were not supposed to be dating at all that got caught. Campus police caught a couple doing something in their vehicle in the wee hours of the morning before daylight. That was after I retired so I have no idea who it was.
TheSirfurryanimalWales · 61-69, M
NankerPhelge · 61-69, M
@TheSirfurryanimalWales It's none of the company's business.
FreestyleArt · 36-40, M
Assuming I was young and not married,
irrespective of whether the co-worker felt the same,
I'd avoid acting on the attraction.
Earning a living is far more important than a fleeting affair.
However, in my case, I wouldn't need the company rule to put the breaks on; I think getting involved with someone at work is way too messy.
If I was looking for a lover or life-partner, I'd look outside the workplace, most likely in my social circle, at evening classes, etc.
irrespective of whether the co-worker felt the same,
I'd avoid acting on the attraction.
Earning a living is far more important than a fleeting affair.
However, in my case, I wouldn't need the company rule to put the breaks on; I think getting involved with someone at work is way too messy.
If I was looking for a lover or life-partner, I'd look outside the workplace, most likely in my social circle, at evening classes, etc.
Ambroseguy80 · 56-60, M
Nimbus · M
@Ambroseguy80 Good thinking.
AbbeyRhode · F
PrincessVelvet · F
Nimbus · M
@PrincessVelvet Interesting :)
PoetryNEmotion · F
Nimbus · M
@SW-User 😛
Starsandfire · 31-35, F
Nimbus · M
@NankerPhelge Some companies extend the rules via a contract to include good behaviour as they say the employee is representing the company at all times.
Some even insist on access to their Facebook accounts in an effort to monitor them.
Some even insist on access to their Facebook accounts in an effort to monitor them.
NankerPhelge · 61-69, M
@Nimbus That comment has landed in the wrong place. It clearly should be posted as a follow-up to my "How? They can only enforce rules about what happens on their premises, nowhere else" comment. I often see comments erroneously posted as separate answers like that. How does it happen?
What the employee does outside the workplace has fluck all to do with the company and that's it.
What the employee does outside the workplace has fluck all to do with the company and that's it.
Somewhereovertherainbow · 51-55, F
CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
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CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
@Nimbus On the other hand, if they can afford to fire you for such a stupid reason it must mean you are easily replaceable, therefore not special in any way, just another cog in the machine. They don't even respect you as a professional in your field who knows what to do if they can discard you just like that. Being in that position I'd probably reconsider my priorities in life.
CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
@Nimbus True
Nyloncapes · 61-69, M
Wait for the office christmas party then be no romance lol
Nyloncapes · 61-69, M
@Nimbus yes lol 😁
Nimbus · M
@Nyloncapes 😛
Nimbus · M
@SW-User ☺️
smiler2012 · 61-69
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout what you smoke tobacco together that is good 😀😀😀
smiler2012 · 61-69
come on nimby how can people want to kill romance we are all adult @nimbus