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how important is it to have some one who mothers you?

im really torn about my relationship with my mom, I do not know what to do. I like her as a person but not as a mom, she is not a good mom to me, she used to be a better mom when i was a kid but now she does not care about my feelings and physical health, I can be throwing up ask for her to go to the store and get me medication and she lectures me how bad medication is how that is not the way to solve the problem and never gets it for me she comes back with herbal medication that does not even help.

anyway how important it is to have someone like a mother in your life who parents you like a mother? my dad just does not seem like enough. I have been feeling really sick lately my stomach hurts and I wish someone was there to tell me it is not my fault not something i did to cause it.

its hard to me to be indifferent or mean to my mom because it makes my dad angry and I want him to be happy with me, but my mom needs to understand i am not going to treat her like a mom she is just a roommate to me. the problem is my dad will be mad if I do not treat her like a mom.
I have always put in all my energy and effort int helping her telling her about my life i but the worse she treated me the more secrets i keep form her the more things i do that she does not like. and yet she still thinks our relationship is great that I think she is a good parent and she isnt. she told me she does not like my presents and presents in general are a way for people to buy junk and collect useless junk. I get upset start crying and she tells me I am over reacting, she does not like children, she told me that she wanted children until she had me.
how do I get my point across without making my dad angry?
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@Kimcat I doubt its dementia or any age related ilness, she is still young. I wish i could get her to see a doctor, like a therapist or something I dont know anything about her side of the family or her childhood but we have a lot of family problems with the family members on her side of the family. she told me my grandma never loved me and my grandma got mad. she does love me. I dont know what to do thats wh I gave up I talked to her about our relationship and she thinks it fantastic, I dont agree. she thinks its good because I share everything with her I buy her stuff. i want her to tell me she loves me.
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@Kimcat she is so anti medicine its impossible.now a herbal medicine doctor or and acupuncturist she would visit every day if she could.
4meAndyou · F
I don't really know. I have never had anyone actually mother me. But I will tell you this...you can't force your mother to conform to YOUR idea of what a mother should be, and neither can your father. Your mother is your mother, and it sounds like she has a bee in her bonnet about OTC drugs vs herbal drugs, and you can try talking to her about your feelings (later) that OTC drugs work better and faster and that you would appreciate it if she could respect your feelings, and ask at the same time if you can see a doctor, because it sounds like you might have a parasite or stomach ulcer.
@4meAndyou I cant wait to see the gastroenterologist, i have a referral from my doctor but they told me it will take about a month to process from my insurance, I have capital blue cross and well span family medicine is my clinics.
OMG she really said that "She wanted children till she had u"!! what a horrible thing 2 say... I feel so bad 4 u!😢
@Childnomore I know, but yet I cant stop being nice to her. 😭 like when people say its the only mom i will ever have, i feel sad. this sounds bad but i wish she lived somewhere else and it was just me and my dad, the good thing is haveing such a bad mom makes me realize how great my dad is.
Awww that is really sweet! I am glad u have a gr8 Dad n that is a gr8 way 2 look at it
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