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I Am a Child Abuse Survivor

Not all monsters are hiding under the bed, for many the monsters are the very ones that are supposed to love and protect. The world is a scary place for children and when they are not even safe in their own homes life is a living nightmare.
Society can be judged on the way it treats it's most vulnerable. While no one would argue that the system is severely flawed, it's not the system that failed me. It was rather the other adults that knew of the abuse and chose to turn a blind eye. As a child it made me believe that I was worthless if others didn't care then it was the only explanation. As an adult I asked those that could have helped and didn't. I was stunned by the lack of remorse, although I can now see I shouldn't have been. Looking at things now with an adult perspective it's clear how utterly selfish these people were. They didn't want to go out of their way for anything but themselves and had no problem throwing a helpless child on the alter of their own happiness and security.
My Aunt now 81 and feeble calls, she's crying because my mother shoved her. What did she expect? My mother has always been a bully she will never change and no one has ever challenged her. Her own grandchildren want nothing to do with her and she is desperate to exhibit her nastiness. As a grown woman and not some helpless child she should have said something to finally put the bully in her place, she could cut off all contact with hers sister as she is under no obligation to be a punching bag. She said and did nothing, and neither did I. Instead I was simply grateful that this was a phone call and not in person where she could see me rolling my eyes in disgust at the utter selfishness.
You may only be one person in the world, but you may be the world to one person. My life could have been so much different if just one person had cared. Keep this in mind please when dealing with children and young people.
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shadowplay · 22-25, M
for me the only one that did care turned out to be a pedophile. because my shitbag parents made me an easy target.i think lots of kids abused by parents end up getting targeted
by other monsters
curiosi · 61-69, F
Very sorry.
SagePoet · 61-69, M
the abuse my parents inflicted on me made me an easy target for sexual predators too, seemed like I attracted all the pedophiles wherever I went, was always getting grabbed, touched and sexually violated.
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
Yes. It's true. An adult who worked at my school molested me when I was 10 years old. And I was the school bully's favorite target. Abuse sets a child up for further victimization.
shadowplay · 22-25, M
@Sissyboy1954: sorry to hear that, it was like after the fist time somehow they knew. like i had a target on my back.
shadowplay · 22-25, M
@greenmountaingal: it is sad how many of us are here .good indication of how bad this problem is . doesn't seem like anyone is paying attention
SagePoet · 61-69, M
@greenmountaingal: schools were not friendly places to me as a kid. I was abused many times by many different people, sexually abused by men, humiliated and degraded by women. As I went from grade to grade, school to school the sexual bullies made me their favorite target.
shadowplay · 22-25, M
@Sissyboy1954: my first abuser was my 6th grade teacher i was 10,it happened at the school and other places also
SagePoet · 61-69, M
@shadowplay: I agree. The first time it happened I was so ashamed and humiliated. And then it happened again, different man and then seemed like they all knew. And they approached me put their arm around me and said "come with me, I have something to show you."
shadowplay · 22-25, M
@Sissyboy1954 i didn't even know it was wrong ,i was told everybody did it. it was how you showed someone you loved them
SagePoet · 61-69, M
@shadowplay: I definitely know how you feel. One teacher in the 7th grade offered me "protection" from the kids who were abusing me. When he took me to his office and locked the door I knew I was in trouble. Camp counselor's abused me, teachers, tutors, mentors, even the clergy. It's like everyone knew and spread the word that I was "easy."
shadowplay · 22-25, M
@Sissyboy1954: when i told my parents ,they took that as an invitation to do it to.
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This message was deleted by its author.
revenant · F
@shadowplay yes they pave the way because it is familiar..familiar, family
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
@shadowplay This is very true. I was molested by a teacher at my elementary school. Later, I found out he had also molested another girl as well as me. Both of us were the only two students who came from homes where our fathers had recently left because of divorce (which was very uncommon back then in the 1950s).
Arrow17 · 46-50, F
@greenmountaingal I am so sorry for your experience. It wasn't your fault.