I Am a Child Abuse Survivor

It bothers me that there are so many of us. And that at the same time it's something we don't know how to talk to eachother about. And I hate that it follows me in my head still even though I'm almost grown and I'm living a good life. It worries me that in years I'll still have bad dreams or randomly think about it like I do now. And it bothers me that my close friends don't know how to act about it because they never had to go through it or that my boyfriend beats himself up because he doesn't know what to do when I have my lows. I don't think I'll ever understand why.

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KayraJordyn · F

Every experience is so unique. Discussions can be difficult to start. When we open up, though, beautiful things can happen.

I'm lucky. I was mostly mentally and emotionally affected. The physical was spanking with belts. I was a lucky one.

More often than not, those who have experienced life as a child have been abused. Something we don't always realize or consider. So many people, innocents, so much pain...

You could start a support group here. You know?

canusernamebemyusername · M

@KayraJordyn Sadly they would probably take such a group down cause things too "adult" would be discussed. smh
But the site dailystrength used to be good. It is a support group site.

littleblackbird · 26-30, F

@canusernamebemyusername I tried a therepist for a while but I just couldn't ever find one that fit, it felt like being studied too much

KayraJordyn · F

I had the same experience. Once I found a social worker who was a counselor and quite intuitive, I knew I had found my match. Perhaps look for counselors instead of licensed therapists? @littleblackbird

canusernamebemyusername · M

@littleblackbird Well a good therapist should feel like your friend even if you do feel studied. Sadly they are sorta studying. A person, even a non doctor has to study and know in order to help you. But from a doc it might feel too concentrated. Too many personal questions in too short a time:(

littleblackbird · 26-30, F

@KayraJordyn I've looked into that a bit. Most of them around here are from a biblical stand point. Which is appreciated but not what I think I need

littleblackbird · 26-30, F

@canusernamebemyusername I think that was the issue. Feeling like a study suject rather than someone to be helped

canusernamebemyusername · M

Also let other be your therapist as well. A good friend makes a great doctor. Although take any prescriptions for pills with a grain of salt. lol
I was studied too (for different reasons) but I didn't mind. Although it was a lot. What I did was make a medical resume. I broke it into history. Meds I have tried. And what I expect from a doctor. You might could do something similar. Write your history down. Even if it is for no one but yourself. That can help get rid of a big chunk of the questions then if you ever choose to show it to a doctor.

littleblackbird · 26-30, F

@canusernamebemyusername That's a good idea. I used to get agitated having to go over so many details over and over to every new one

canusernamebemyusername · M

@littleblackbird Me too. I have a long medical history and got so tired of having to go over it with every new person.

KayraJordyn · F

I did this for medical history as well. Saved me sooo much time and anxt, explaining to each new doc, specialist, whatever, and instead let us use our appointment time for more valuable matters. @littleblackbird