Deleted everything
I deleted all my posts. Just wanted to start over, idk. Some of those posts were hard to read, just back during a time when life felt okay. Now it feels permanently dark. I try to tell myself well maybe you’re just in a tough part of life and it’ll get better. I can only hope. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem as they say but it doesn’t stop the thoughts. Just wanting to disappear, not hurt anyone in my absence. Just be gone so I don’t have to be such a disappointment anymore. I can’t help but have those thoughts.
Someone asked me if I’m starved for attention, announcing I’m deleting my posts and still posting. Nah just if anyone remotely remembers who I was, it was kinda me saying I’m still here, just my profile was wiped.
Anyways.. hope I can sleep soon for another very meaningless day. The days run together, I don’t notice holidays. I’m just hoping for a massive change in my life. I’ve never felt this down and hopeless. If there was a time to end it, it would be now and yet I know it could be even worse. I can’t take worse. It’s enough already.
Someone asked me if I’m starved for attention, announcing I’m deleting my posts and still posting. Nah just if anyone remotely remembers who I was, it was kinda me saying I’m still here, just my profile was wiped.
Anyways.. hope I can sleep soon for another very meaningless day. The days run together, I don’t notice holidays. I’m just hoping for a massive change in my life. I’ve never felt this down and hopeless. If there was a time to end it, it would be now and yet I know it could be even worse. I can’t take worse. It’s enough already.
