Upset
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Its the job thing again

Im feeling so awful and useless rn , I still cant do simple tasks right .Im feeling so idiot now i wish i never went to work there . Today we were cleaning the place but i had no idea about what i was doing ?? Like i was so lost and feeling in the dark like , where and when do i push the water ? What direction ?? Like , I helped to clean this places other times but i still dont know how to do it?? I feel like my brain just doesnt realize how to make this . I failed multiple times during this cleaning that i ended up stressing one of colleagues . Like , she was kinda done with me , like she doenst mistreated me she was just dissapointed and angry, im not saying this to play the victim or smt , if you were in her place you would be pissed at me ,with good reason . I dont blame her cuz shes right , its something so f*cking simple , i am already an adult , i should know what to do , i have done this before , but my brain dont get it ?? I feel so cursed .I dont want to be a burden to my colleagues , i really didnt wanted to stress her specially now that she is pregnant and she is not even her twenties ,she is in a pretty difficult time of her life . i wish i could just disapear and never step there ever .i fear i will fail again
I feel like theres a fog in my brain , that appears everyday at some point at my work , I behave like if i have dementia idk whats my problem . I just wish things were easy for me like it is to other people
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Mudkip · 31-35, M
Just focus at one task at a time