Content Warning ⚠ 1 in every 3 women
....and that's only the ones who speak up: those who are old enough, supported enough, brave enough - who have somewhere safe to be, who have people to help them, a social system in place, and others to advocate for them in their messed up state.
- then there are the others who are too scared, too shocked, too fucked up, too confused, too beaten, or just so dehumanised into a state of numbness to do, or SAY ... anything.
So really......its prolly more like 1 in every 2.
Look around you today. Where you walk, where you work. At the store, the park, the dentist, outside your window: at half of the women/girls you see - they are jane does.
And rape isn't just the violent, terrifying kind....sometimes is isolated private coercion: " if you loved me you would", "ill tell everyone you're a bad mum/liar/whore...(Take your pick), "you do want that new car dont you?",...type thing: a bribe, a threat, usually by the one they thought "loved" them. Made to feel too guilty, ashamed, in debt, to say no.
1 in 2
Every second woman you see.
And people get up in arms about pregnancy terminations, women's wages, feminism... when there is THIS REALITY.
Think about it
I mean REALLY THINK ABOUT IT !
If every second man was violently held down, terrified, violated with some implement....made to feel so alone and guilty that they had to silently submit to such an act to be able to keep their life........ would this world allow this to happen every day?
Now this isnt a 'go' at men. We all know its the nice guys that keep this world working - the hard workers, the ones with integrity, kindness, charity, generosity...and decent souls.
Its society. The way its become.
Its many who made it to the top, the power positions, the inner circle, the big boys club. It gets pushed under the carpet, fudged off...erased.
When did being a good guy become a silent thing ?
Why are all the good people so quiet?
How did the assholes gain all the power?
When did we all start fearing and folding to this system ?
When will it change ?
I sit here at the lunch table and look around at my coworkers. Theres six of us.....and yeah, we've been chatting. Shit has been in the news.
And the stats don't lie - 3 of us are each a jane doe of rape.
...and not justta single rape either.
We can get to the moon, split the atom, do open heart surgery and build tunnels under the sea and skyscrapers miles high.
Yet, by a guesstimate.. every MINUTE that goes by.... another rape or sexual assault is committed.
Every minute.
In the time it took you to read this: 2 women/girls are now terrified, crying and are currently in fear of their life and being violated.
And it's not just women.... there are NO CONCRETE STATS AT ALL for men or boys.
NONE.
17%, 26%, 33%, 71%...1 in 7?, 1 in 21?....no one knows!
....and that's bloody scary too.
Then we invert it, Perpetrators:
On average, a serial rapist can have 30 - 50 victims. This doesnt include the single offenders or the partners who use repeated or domineering coercion, guilt or self decided power on their partners. Or ...women rapists.
Then theres prevelence: (and these numbers are considered VERY CONSERVATIVE), about 25%(?) of the male population are perpetrators.
Over all rapists? : 93% men, 7% women. But take into account, less men are likely to admit being raped so those numbers are VERY likely to be wrong.
So 1 in four men is likely.
This is the reality women have to face.
I think this is why men dont understand our hesitation, hidden fear, reticence to engage and just all round *walls up* attitude.
Its always in the back of our mind.
Well at least for half of us who have already had it happen.
It NEVER goes away.
Even if you deal with it, move forward, get on with life....its still there.
It scars your mind, your heart.
Every man you look at, even feel brave enough to consider getting close to, you look at him with doubt.
You just don't know anymore.
So, dear Men, please remember this:
- Other asshole "men" have loaded the relationship gun AGAINST you.
Women live with the knowledge that half of them WILL be raped, and a quarter of men are potentially rapists.
- those are SHITTY STATISTICS that are a reality for us.
Its why we live poor, or commit to jobs with crappy hours, long shifts, or just do undesirable jobs....coz its better alone and secure, than to risk the odds.
I know so many of you men have a other crosses yourselves to bare: being ripped off in a divorce, falsely accused by a woman, too much responsibility and too little pay, your own abuse to deal with.
But i don't know if you know what it's like to walk in fear calling from the back of your mind.
It stops us women from going out, shopping at certain times, being social, or just plain considering any closeness ever again.
Think of howmany women you know, and now wonder who, out of half of them....live with this.
🫤🤷♀
- then there are the others who are too scared, too shocked, too fucked up, too confused, too beaten, or just so dehumanised into a state of numbness to do, or SAY ... anything.
So really......its prolly more like 1 in every 2.
Look around you today. Where you walk, where you work. At the store, the park, the dentist, outside your window: at half of the women/girls you see - they are jane does.
And rape isn't just the violent, terrifying kind....sometimes is isolated private coercion: " if you loved me you would", "ill tell everyone you're a bad mum/liar/whore...(Take your pick), "you do want that new car dont you?",...type thing: a bribe, a threat, usually by the one they thought "loved" them. Made to feel too guilty, ashamed, in debt, to say no.
1 in 2
Every second woman you see.
And people get up in arms about pregnancy terminations, women's wages, feminism... when there is THIS REALITY.
Think about it
I mean REALLY THINK ABOUT IT !
If every second man was violently held down, terrified, violated with some implement....made to feel so alone and guilty that they had to silently submit to such an act to be able to keep their life........ would this world allow this to happen every day?
Now this isnt a 'go' at men. We all know its the nice guys that keep this world working - the hard workers, the ones with integrity, kindness, charity, generosity...and decent souls.
Its society. The way its become.
Its many who made it to the top, the power positions, the inner circle, the big boys club. It gets pushed under the carpet, fudged off...erased.
When did being a good guy become a silent thing ?
Why are all the good people so quiet?
How did the assholes gain all the power?
When did we all start fearing and folding to this system ?
When will it change ?
I sit here at the lunch table and look around at my coworkers. Theres six of us.....and yeah, we've been chatting. Shit has been in the news.
And the stats don't lie - 3 of us are each a jane doe of rape.
...and not justta single rape either.
We can get to the moon, split the atom, do open heart surgery and build tunnels under the sea and skyscrapers miles high.
Yet, by a guesstimate.. every MINUTE that goes by.... another rape or sexual assault is committed.
Every minute.
In the time it took you to read this: 2 women/girls are now terrified, crying and are currently in fear of their life and being violated.
And it's not just women.... there are NO CONCRETE STATS AT ALL for men or boys.
NONE.
17%, 26%, 33%, 71%...1 in 7?, 1 in 21?....no one knows!
....and that's bloody scary too.
Then we invert it, Perpetrators:
On average, a serial rapist can have 30 - 50 victims. This doesnt include the single offenders or the partners who use repeated or domineering coercion, guilt or self decided power on their partners. Or ...women rapists.
Then theres prevelence: (and these numbers are considered VERY CONSERVATIVE), about 25%(?) of the male population are perpetrators.
Over all rapists? : 93% men, 7% women. But take into account, less men are likely to admit being raped so those numbers are VERY likely to be wrong.
So 1 in four men is likely.
This is the reality women have to face.
I think this is why men dont understand our hesitation, hidden fear, reticence to engage and just all round *walls up* attitude.
Its always in the back of our mind.
Well at least for half of us who have already had it happen.
It NEVER goes away.
Even if you deal with it, move forward, get on with life....its still there.
It scars your mind, your heart.
Every man you look at, even feel brave enough to consider getting close to, you look at him with doubt.
You just don't know anymore.
So, dear Men, please remember this:
- Other asshole "men" have loaded the relationship gun AGAINST you.
Women live with the knowledge that half of them WILL be raped, and a quarter of men are potentially rapists.
- those are SHITTY STATISTICS that are a reality for us.
Its why we live poor, or commit to jobs with crappy hours, long shifts, or just do undesirable jobs....coz its better alone and secure, than to risk the odds.
I know so many of you men have a other crosses yourselves to bare: being ripped off in a divorce, falsely accused by a woman, too much responsibility and too little pay, your own abuse to deal with.
But i don't know if you know what it's like to walk in fear calling from the back of your mind.
It stops us women from going out, shopping at certain times, being social, or just plain considering any closeness ever again.
Think of howmany women you know, and now wonder who, out of half of them....live with this.
🫤🤷♀
