I found EP and then this place because of my shitty marriage

I'll never forget the day my divorce was finalized. People talk about having divorce parties and all that, but I was not in the mood to celebrate at all. I went straight from the courthouse, manila envelope in hand, to a Hooters(yes, I actually liked their food) and I did a crossword puzzle with one of the waitresses. Feeling slightly better, I went to Tower Records and bought some CDs and DVDs. That was more like it. When I went home, it definitely hit me. I had a girlfriend at the time, but the weather was very bad that night and she didn't want to come over. Looking back, that was probably for the best.

I put on one of the new CDs, "Nothing's going to change my world," said John Lennon. Indeed. But it was a long road back to that world.

I'll tell you what I told my brother: You're getting your life back.

I have no idea what you were like during the process, but it is one of the most stressful events in all of life, topped only by things like "death of a spouse". You probably were depressed, and depressed people tend to be combative. No matter, it is your personal grief process and no one can tell you how to go through it.

It was 25 years ago. I stayed way too long, should have kicked her to the curb long before I did. But my situation began shortly after 9/11 and was all but done less than a year later. But staying as I did made me realize that I tried absolutely everything...and I would not have found my current fiancee otherwise.

So, the story is not over. Don't be fooled into thinking that it is.

Your relationship died today.

Like with any loss, it's okay to grieve the relationship that you thought you'd have had... those things that you planned out in your head that will never be now.

Even if you saw the terminal diagnosis, it can still come as a huge shock to actually be sitting with the death of a marriage and you don't have the fixes right now. That's okay, too... just sit with it. It doesn't have to be solved right now, just let the immediate feelings work through you like you would with a literal death.

Right now you are trying to get a grip on the shit end of the stick , and only because you still can’t allow yourself to accept what you can not change. It’s toxic for you .

The reason it helps to talk about your issues is because it’s therapeutic, and it forces your mind to work the problem in stead of sticking your head in the sand. Find a you project to do . Fitness, remodeling something in your house , night course… use that energy for something beneficial . 👍🏻

I wish I had some words but what you’re going through is a horrible thing. There were never any words when I went through my divorce. Try and be graceful and patient with yourself. Allow yourself to grieve this part of your chapter. Keep writing here. I don’t know why but it helps. My thoughts are with you today
🖤

There’s a bittersweet beauty in starting over. It hurts and it’s painful and it’s awful…but the dark new beginnings have shadows of light. Lean into that ❤

ay.. 😐