I had a muslim girlfriend and my family will never know about it.
One time my brother made a joke because I came home at the same time as someone wearing a hijab stopped by. He said, "Oh, I thought you brought home a muslim girlfriend."
I said back, How would you react if I did have a muslim girlfriend?
I said this because I had an ex who was muslim. No longer present in my life, but for reasons unrelated to her religion. So there was still the implication of my tolerance of her lifestyle choices being an issue.
After I asked the question, he and mom both looked at me, shocked. I think they sensed that there was some seriousness in my tone.
My brother asked me a question that was very carefully worded. I don't remember the exact phrasing but it was something like, "Do you believe in and submit to Allah as God?"
He's spent a lot of time as a missionary and otherwise working jobs in the church, so I think what he asked me was sort of a pre-loaded question that he had memorized from some of his duties. I got the sense that he was completely serious and probing me.
I should have answered him, I believe in Allah deez nuts. But I just said, no.
Thankfully, that was the end of the conversation and no more questions or suspicion followed.
And my answer was the truth. That woman never convinced me of anything in the religious realm, nor did she try to convert me. We just saw one another for who we were, and didn't let our different beliefs get in the way.
Though the tension in the air cleared after I answered my brother, that was the moment I became absolutely certain that no one in my family will ever hear about this ex of mine. They wouldn't understand or tolerate it.
It already rocked the boat enough that one time I had a girlfriend from South Africa, who even agreed with their faith.
I have to keep much of my life private from them in order to protect myself — including Suzanne.
I miss her.
I said back, How would you react if I did have a muslim girlfriend?
I said this because I had an ex who was muslim. No longer present in my life, but for reasons unrelated to her religion. So there was still the implication of my tolerance of her lifestyle choices being an issue.
After I asked the question, he and mom both looked at me, shocked. I think they sensed that there was some seriousness in my tone.
My brother asked me a question that was very carefully worded. I don't remember the exact phrasing but it was something like, "Do you believe in and submit to Allah as God?"
He's spent a lot of time as a missionary and otherwise working jobs in the church, so I think what he asked me was sort of a pre-loaded question that he had memorized from some of his duties. I got the sense that he was completely serious and probing me.
I should have answered him, I believe in Allah deez nuts. But I just said, no.
Thankfully, that was the end of the conversation and no more questions or suspicion followed.
And my answer was the truth. That woman never convinced me of anything in the religious realm, nor did she try to convert me. We just saw one another for who we were, and didn't let our different beliefs get in the way.
Though the tension in the air cleared after I answered my brother, that was the moment I became absolutely certain that no one in my family will ever hear about this ex of mine. They wouldn't understand or tolerate it.
It already rocked the boat enough that one time I had a girlfriend from South Africa, who even agreed with their faith.
I have to keep much of my life private from them in order to protect myself — including Suzanne.
I miss her.
