I hope this new friendship pans out for me and some complaints about other things

For me my friendships are about quality not quantity and Marissa is a very kind older Christian lady who is only a few months younger than my parents. But that doesn’t bother me I’m open to adult friends of all ages from 20s to elderly. I can be friends with families with kids too. I just kind of miss the old ways when a place was like an extended village and you could be really close friends with one or two of your neighbors and people looked out for each other. Going over someone’s house for tea or coffee ( I don’t actually drink coffee) or hot chocolate and snacks and meals and to just chat and have philosophical discussions about insights and life revelations, observations about society and the world. When I told her I didn’t drive and picked the Dunkin’ Donuts closest to our houses so I could walk there or get a ride from my dad in case it was raining. Tomorrow. She offered to pick me up and said she knows it’s better to meet in a. Nuetral spot so we. Will not be interrupted but she also offered to get together at her house if I wanted. I can tell she is kind and trusting person. My parents don’t want me going over strangers houses and taking rides from strangers. Or people I don’t.know very well. I don’t blame them even when my intuition telling me nothing is amiss.eventually i will be able to go to her house and take rides from her if my parents get to know her and I think she would gladly meet with them. My parents just want me to be careful. Even though I can be very anxious and paranoid, being suspicious a lot of the time is really exhausting. I get no red flags from her or her husband when I have seen him out and about. I just feel Marissa is just a hospitable person and likes to get to know different people. She is outgoing and said minus a couple of people she really doesn’t know anyone in the neighborhood that closely. Sure people will make chit chat when she is. Out walking her dog but it doesn’t go beyond that and will say hi but she often doesn’t even know their names. She is turning 58 soon. I have had bad things happen to me before so I think I know when someone is shady by now and learn to trust my gut. But my parents don’t trust my instincts. They say I’m still very naive. I feel undermined sometimes in my family. I think she said she and her husband get along with the neighbor John because he also shares their faith. They are Christians. But they don’t shove their opinions down your throat. She said even if she doesn’t agree with something it’s not her place to judge others and she keeps her opinions to herself even if people don’t want to be what god made them to be ie for example non -binary instead. Of accepting being. A male or female they were born as. She accepts my intersexuality and. Respects my gender identity being female. She says I have not been masculinized and thinks I would no chance against men in physical strength to defend myself if it came down to it. Meaning no offense to me she said because men and women are not the same. Now in some circles that could get you in major trouble for saying that nowadays. But it’s true. She used to be an athlete. Scientifically men and women have different. Physicalities. Were I to be an athlete or something putting me on the men’s teams would not be fair because I have female hormone levels. Anyone can see I look and sound female. Until eight years ago I thought I was completely female. Everyone accepts me as a woman and even little kids call me a she. It’s hard to ignore what your eyes and ears tell you. I think she’s in the know because her daughters are 20 and 14. So young people tend to be much more aware of gender issues than the older generations. Of course I would never misgender someone on purpose and I know I’m not supposed to assume anyone’s gender identity based on gender expression etc. but we do notice sexual characteristics and we sex people, animals, and plants. Maybe. Because I keep it simple people haven’t given me too much. Pushback. I have yet to have anyone refer to me as a man intentionally and luckily no one. Has tried to hurt me for my hermaphroditism. Yet. ( you know. Beating, rape, killing or just general. Name calling and harassment. ) maybe I’m just lucky because I pass as completely female. Because of my phenotype. Some intersex and trans people are bullied and treated mercilessly, also ridiculed and harassed. Heck a trans coworker of my sisters at at the cafe she. Works for was asked if they were trans by a customer. That’s awkward…. She said did you miss the five.o clock shadow? Well she’s aware of how she looks and sounds. I don’t think you are supposed to ask a stranger if they are trans. Though isn’t that a. Little rude? Also most people don’t ask what forms of address and. Pronouns someone uses because to the average person that could be seen as rude and uncomfortable to ask. Whereas in certain circles , it’s the standard to respectfully. Ask what terms of address someone uses and what. Pronouns they use for themselves. I think for the average person, this is really new and you have. To give them some grace when they accidentally mess up. Now if corrected and they continue to refer to someone in a way they don’t like then that’s just mean and antagonistic. Respect is a two way street. Anyway, Marissa is very nice. I hope this. Friendship blossoms and I would love to know what she studies in her bible discipleship meetings. Theology is a lot like philosophy. I can be friends with people who are different from me as long as there is mutual respect and. Acceptance. Now some things I don’t. Accept like hardcore BDSM or respect it. Because to me it’s just ritualized abuse even if it is supposedly consensual. Leather subculture etc. I think it’s too much and I don’t like it that some groups. Try to make it apart of lgbtqia+ demographics. I mean I know some people have harmless kinks like foot fetishes or whatever. I’m not talking about that. I am talking about stuff that leaves severe bruising and welts or worse. Stuff that is really fucked up. But if you say that nowadays you are kink shaming or being kink phobic or something. We cringe when we hear someone was severely bruised and burned. But under extreme bdsm that kind of sickness is being celebrated. I am maybe too vanilla. For how this world is becoming. I find some sexual practices to really be disturbing and frankly repulsive. I mean I agree on certain things with. People of faith it’s like the metaphorical devil took over and made the most outrageous practices seem acceptable. I feel like back then society was too close minded against gender and sexual/romantic minorities. But now the pendulum has swung into the opposite extreme and people are getting death threats and boycotted because for example they say biological sex is real. Look what happened to J.K Rowling on social media. An ordinary girl who has some reservations about being undressed in front of someone who is completely male can be labeled a TERF. Extreme trans activists are making life miserable for ordinary trans people and women especially. Feminists have been violently attacked by trans activists for the past 5-10 years. This. Does. Not happen where I live as far as I can tell. I don’t think folks would put up with that shit here. I have seen trump and Vance signs outside a couple of houses. But I checked the political demographics of my town on best places etc. it is right between a light blue and light red. Slightly on the mark towards light blue. While I don’t like right wing politics., the extreme left wing has gone insane too. I can’t even imagine physically attacking someone for believing in science for example. I am moderate to progressive in my social, political, and economic leanings. Yet even I am wondering what the hell happened to the. Ultra left wing. I don’t understand the violence that has taken over. I thought authoritarianism was an extreme right wing idea. Sometimes I am glad to be protected by my little bubble of peace and sanity. Although I do get issues with my clothing sometimes which really irks me like one old man saying it wasn’t that cold outside last month with me in a coat and scarf and I quietly told him to mind his own business. Many of the people here are old/older adults and middle age or young families with children. It’s not the most diverse place to live but it’s pretty safe and quiet. There is some litter thrown on the side of the roads which really shouldn’t happen. But almost no one bothers me when I walk the streets. I have never been sexually harassed in town or anything. I see kids biking around by themselves and no one bats an eye. We even have a man who comes for the summer recently who converted an ambulance. Into an ice cream and snacks truck and goes around the neighborhood selling snacks and drinks. It’s not the most striking place and doesn’t have the most historical beautiful architecture. It’s not an arts village or a college town or even world renown for the most beautiful nature. But it does have its wildlife like deer and foxes and we have woodchucks and maybe even close to coyotes and wolves. It’s not the worst place in the world to live. It is a small semi rural town nearby other bigger towns and small cities. It’s a half hour away from providence Rhode Island and an hour from Boston Massachusetts. We recently got a train station junction in our border with the. Next town and you can go into Boston now. I just lament the lack of public transit services because my parents don’t let me drive anymore. I have to accept rides from my family to go anywhere. I hated other drivers for being aggressive on the road and just out of control which made my temper flare up and my anxiety spike. But I miss the freedom of taking myself places even if it was only locally. My parents didn’t let me drive to Boston or long distance. Like to New York. I could only go up to providence or Newport. Or the smaller towns near them . I couldn’t go to the side of Rhode Island that was closer to Connecticut or drive north of Boston. I could not go to western Massachusetts or close to central mass like Worcester. But at least within local places I could drive up to 30 to 45 minutes away. They didn’t want me going to cape cod by myself like Provincetown or an hour or two away. They considered it too far for me to be driving by myself although I went to Falmouth on my own. I have lived in some ways a very sheltered life. I am all over the place with this posting I know. But my point even as. Sheltered in some ways as I am, I realize the craziness that is going on with the wider world. Old ladies shouldn’t be getting bashed because they believe biological sex is real. People should not be getting death threats or doxxed online because of they don’t agree with the extremism of today’s sociopolitical climate. I think trump is a stain on our national consciousness Vance and his whole cabinet. But I could not even bring myself to threaten. Trump supporters or make their lives miserable for what they believe. I am against the. Actions of ICE ripping apart immigrant families. And against slashing funding for diversity inclusion and his cuts to different programs are putting people out of jobs. His slashing of education. And medical initiatives. The tariffs he is imposing. I wish Donald trump was never elected. President but I’m still not going to threaten republicans and trump supporters and just disregard them as human beings., people today seem to have lost the ability to have difficult conversations. Civilly and trying to understand the other persons point of viiew. I am equally scared of the religious right wing and right wing populists ( who are extremists) as well the far left extremists. I wish we could go back to the middle of the road moderate policies and. Sociopolitical climate that was less divisive. I wish it was easier to find common ground with people from a variety of backgrounds and cultures, I think that is Christlike way. Jesus was ahead of his time two thousand years ago. My friend Marissa like I said is a Christian and I think she believes strongly in what would Jesus do? I’m not practicing anything in particular. But I like to make a few close friends from different backgrounds and cultures and believe that though people. Believe differently we should be able to coexist ( minus extreme behaviors or ideas.) I’m not a Christian. But I respect some of Jesus ideas for his time period. He also included women in his ministry which was radical at the time. I like that gods love is supposed to be for everyone and a true Christian believes in embracing everyone whether or not they agree with their choices or whichever path they are on. Whether it be being a follower of another faith or spiritual path or lack thereof, being.a gender or sexual minority, another race or ethnicity, having a disability. Etc. love should be the true message of any belief.system and any faith. I wish love was the dominant. Theme of. The time but it’s not. I wish life wasn’t so perverted and now getting choked, slapped, and. Beaten was seen as sexy. I wish love was the basis for all relationships whether opposite sex, same sex, intersex, or whatever. I wish love was the dominant force in everyday life and society didn’t throw out. The disadvantaged , the poor, and homeless, the orphaned, the sick, the meek, the elderly, the disabled, the different, etc. maybe I’m just too much of an idealist but society could be a lot more compassionate and just. It could also be. A lot less perverted. Glorifying of rape culture, extreme bdsm, violent pornography and pedophilia. Just. Stuff that is really sick. I also wish society would stop sexualizing little kids. It’s creepy and disgusting. I swear sometimes I think the. World does. Need some spiritual illumination or enlightenment.