If the world shows

That no one is interested in you. No one is ever going to think of doing anything with you. And what you want most is to be at least one person's choice in life.

Is it wrong to just accept the fact you're always going to be alone and go do a lonely job, essentially avoid human contact anymore then necessary because you know humans don't like you.

"Don't waste your time making someone a priority who makes you an option". I'm not even on the option sheet to anyone

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OogieBoogie · F

I live almost alone. (Live with my kid and her girlfriend, but see them rarely).

And i feel less alone now, than when i was with her dad.
I kinda like my me time. I like the peace.

I mean, i still work ....but even there i dont gel with most people.
But im fine with that.

Id rather be me, peacefully, than dancing around, trying desperately to be someone elses 'option', full of anxiety - its exhausting....and demoralizing 🤷‍♀️

Justafantasy · M

@OogieBoogie be nice to feel I was at least an option to someone. I know that feeling is pathetic and it somehow shows

OogieBoogie · F

@Justafantasy i dont think its pathetic. I think we have an inner intrinsic need to be social creatures, to want touch, feel needed or wanted.

Its healthy.

But i do think that we focus on these things so much, that we believe they will 'complete' us - to the point that we will sacrafice who we are to get it.

And theres the rub .

Personally , i would never want to be an 'option' .
I would want to be wanted.... not some sort of backup plan.

In fact, id much prefer to be wanted by someone, and given quality time say....once a week or even once a month ....than be someone's everyday option that they can opt to have or ignore.

And i think there is something to be said for being comfortable with oneself.
If we feel we need another person to be happy, then aren't we putting the responsibility of our happiness in their hands?

Is that fair ?

Shouldn't we be responsible for our own happiness?

Justafantasy · M

@OogieBoogie humans are social creatures. I agree with the quality time. The problem is I feel like I'm the only one who wants it, and yes I think others are responsible for making us happy, not in "hey that's your duty" but in "hey I hope you enjoy my company enough to want it again"