Why am I feeling uncomfortable now I don't get it 🤔

I been drawing an illustration of an old photo of my grandpa who I lost almost 8 months ago and it's actually a challenge but I do like to challenge myself but anyway in the photo he's carrying like the 5 months old me on his lap. I am totally fine drawing him but once I started drawing myself I got so uncomfortable and started getting so nostalgic and weird and it made me think about my life now and how complicated everything is and all. I wish he was carrying someone else, I chose the photo because it has good lighting in it.
I think I have to stop drawing for today, I don't really have to do a lot today anyway because I have physiotherapy which takes a huge chunk off of my day.

It's also the day itself I just don't feel like doing anything at all and I have zero motivation. Also being in pain isn't really helping. There's a chance my therapist will ask why the hell do I look sad and I wouldn't know what to say. I'm not really used to talk about my feelings or issues I always look at other people and wonder how the hell do they do it.