I’m scared but I deserve this fear....

@HermannFegelein did you take anything?

@PepsiColaP my fucking psychiatrist didn’t wanna give me the medication I needed. I can understand though. He was afraid. But I didn’t need gabapentine. I needed real medicine. It never worked for me.

@HermannFegelein how long have you been on that medication and what did you want ? If you can talk I can call you on skype or you can pm me here. I'm here to listen to you .

@HermannFegelein your better off feeling emotions than feeling numb cause at night time the emotions tries to figure out what wrong when your not numb .its the subconscious mind

@riseofthemachine I hear you man. Anytime I try to get off the booze or medication I end up getting nightmares.

@HermannFegelein you deserve a good life .

@riseofthemachine but I’m weak

@HermannFegelein that's whole part of it . The nightmares seems real when you wake up from them .
I wake up nearly every hour . I'm like this for years and my worst enemy is myself and its night time I realise it . Self loathing Self hatred self condemnation all of those feeling comes up but you have to go through the storm before theres a calm. Let life flow and try not to control it cause that's where the fear comes in

@riseofthemachine but I’m afraid