Did anyone else went through this

I am turning 20 this year
And it feels scary
I feel like I haven't got my shit together even thought I do
I lost interest in everything I cared for
I can't get myself to do the things I need to be doing
I feel like idk where I am headed even thought I had a clear vision few months ago and nothing happened that would cause me to not have things go the way I hope them to go but still I feel very weird and no matter how I try I can't do things I did
I am not efficient I do nothing all do I just sit think about all things I need to do but feel like I am an alien when I try to do them
Like I sit infornt of my books read things that I used to enjoy and feel like an alien to them
I can't fix my sleep schedule like before
I can't push myself to do things

And also idk what life is about
Before I wanted to be a hard workin I wanted to give myself everything I wanted I didn't want to depend on anyone I resented my culture I hated it but now idk anything Idk what stand for what I want what I dont want I feel like a void

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curiosi · 61-69, F Best Comment

Don't push yourself. Calm down sit quietly and listen for your inner voice. It knows what to do and will direct you.

Marydhr · 22-25, F

@curiosi thank you!!

curiosi · 61-69, F

@Marydhr

Marydhr · 22-25, F

@curiosi
It's very scary to loss site of who you are
And not know where you are
Or what you are
In few days
Not be able to be who you were and not know what you are becoming

curiosi · 61-69, F

@Marydhr I have been there many times. Going through it again now.

Marydhr · 22-25, F

@curiosi shit so did it go away eventual or did it change you

curiosi · 61-69, F

@Marydhr Things become clear and then they improve. Yet each time I go through it I get scared non the less. Others have reported same. It's just the way we humans are. What really helps is synchronicity. The more I acknowledge it the more it happens.
Synchronicity is when I randomly think of someone or something and it happens. I was chatting with a friend on here and for some reason I told him about someone I used to know YEARS ago. The very next day I was walking down the road and he pulled up in his truck. I hadn't seen nor heard from in in 25 years!

Synchronicity is a sign that you are on the right path even if you don't feel it.

Marydhr · 22-25, F

@curiosi well I hope so
It's crazy how easy it is to get into something like this and hard to get out of it

Buts it's calming to know that they will get better clearer

Marydhr · 22-25, F

Thank you @curiosi