What kind of person asks you to remove your picture of the adopted son you had together, that passed away?

I recently moved into my new apartment. I had two pics of our son on my bureau mirror. Since my apartment is furnished, I left the bureau behind and one of the two pics on the mirror. I went to the house the other day and my ex said "This is my room now and I want your stuff removed... starting with THIS (my son's picture). I don't want to wake up and look at his face every day!"

Seriously? What. The. Hell?

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Viper · M

First off that way he went about that, it COMPLETELY ALL WRONG! And he's acting like a complete douche bag about it and there is no defending that.

That being said... if I woke every morning seeing a lost love one, and it reminded me of a heart breaking split still going on... that would make me want to crawl back into bed and cry (or worse, die). Because it'd be reminding me of the two most horribly important losses in my life...

So what I get out of it (and I could be completely wrong)... is that he's being a spoiled little b!tch brat and stupidly throwing something in your face to hurt you... in an attempt to try and match the hurt feelings that he's feeling in losing you and your son together.

As the saying goes, misery enjoys company... and he's miserable for some reason, maybe miserable in losing you and your son. And he's trying to make you feel the same as he's feeling.

😟 sorry you had to go through that... clearly there is a lot of pain all the way around. I wish I could help by saying something awesome.

[center][b][u][big]It's cloudy right now, but hopefully the future is bright[/big][/u][/b]

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SW-User

@Viper Actually what you said was perfect and made me cry (in a good way.) Thank you for such a kind and in-depth answer.

I guess I'm just looking at this through a lens of a lot of past hurt. When we found out about the accident, my ex (then husband) literally had zero reaction. He was like a zombie and has never shown any emotion to this day. I had to handle my and my children's grief on my own. It felt like he didn't even care that it happened. Five years later, this felt like another slap in the face. It was like he was saying "take this shit and get it out of here." I just don't understand it. But I'm realizing that I don't have to and it's not my job, nor within my ability to make him care.

The more I let him hurt me, the more happy he is, so I need to let it go.

Viper · M

@SW-User I'm glad it was perfect :) , and you're welcome and it's always nice to help or try to when possible.

Well I certainly don't know your husband, maybe he didn't care at all, maybe he was emotional over everything... but also zombie like, can all being burying one's feelings down deep and/or depression. I don't have a clue of which it might be.
[quote][b]But I'm realizing that I don't have to and it's not my job, nor within my ability to make him care.

The more I let him hurt me, the more happy he is, so I need to let it go.[/b][/quote]
[b][big]YES![/big][/b], if it's over, then it's time to move on :) and take care of yourself :D