Personal Journal (just disregard this if you see this)

I keep making the same mistakes. I always procrastinate and end up getting poor grades. I've gotten accepted into the only college I care about, and I'm worried about my admission being rescinded because of the grades that I've gotten this trimester. The thing is that I never finish homework at a reasonable pace. I always take longer than I should, and this has been going on for 4 years. I hate to admit to people I know in real life because it sounds ridiculous for a senior such as myself to be this slow. I know that people are just going to ask me how I'm going to handle college. It gets lonely doing homework during the midnight. I'm happy that my parents offer to keep me company, but I really don't want to bother them. I'd love to have a foreign friend from a different time zone who would be awake during this time, but I'm always afraid of making new friends in fear that they'll judge me for being this ridiculously stupid and slow. I'm known for complaining a lot of for non-trivial things, but my only excuse is that I have terrible anxiety for everything.