I Am Confused About My Feelings

I find myself not being able to grasp reality. The reality that I have husband who takes time off of work to take care of my parents. A man that cleans and cooks for our family. He may not make enough but pulls the extra weight around the house. I make more and pay all the bills alone. He helps with food and gas expenses. But though he is a good man, I don't feel happy. He doesn't satisfy me emotionally. Our marriage is more of a business transaction. I am 34 and have been with him since I was 15. He to this day, does not know who I am. He does not know my likes and dislikes. He doesn't support my needs emotionally. I have repeatedly told him that church was a big deal to me and he throws that away and ignores my requests. When I go alone with the kids, I sit there upset because he did not go. I always end up doing family things without him, because he always has an excuse not to be apart of it. He doesn't even make an effort to participate in our family activities. Then we get into an argument when I don't feel like telling him where the kids and I are going, even if it's to church! He is in my life but not part of it. We went through a separation period because he used to physically and mentally hurt me. I finally one day called the cops and got him arrested. He went to classes to learn how to get better which he did. I stopped being in love with him since that happened. I stay with him because of the kids. Am I blind and stupid? Am I complaining over a good man or is he still not being the man I need or desire? I don't know what to think. He is a better man, but is still blind to who I am. He still ignores my needs and wants. Sometimes I think about leaving him, but then reality sets in and I remember the kids, so I let it be. Is this how life is supposed to be? I am tired, depressed, and full of anxiety. They say you should be happy with what you got, because it could be worse. Is it true?