What are your thoughts?

My ex still wants me in his life because he cares about me. When we were together, we both agreed that if we ever broke up, we’d still want to remain friends. He’s now with someone else, but their relationship is complicated and undefined. The girl gets jealous of me because my ex often talks about me, especially since she and I have a lot of similarities—almost everything.

I want to distance myself because my feelings are wavering. I know he cherishes me because we’ve been together for a long time and know each other well. He also thinks the girl is just a phase because their relationship is complicated. Maybe that’s why he can’t fully let go of me, even though I’m not the one he’s in love with.

What’s your advice? I don’t want to fall for him again because I think he’s fully moved on and really loves the girl, and I just can’t remain friends with him. I don’t know what’s going on on his mind.

powernap · 56-60, M

First of all, I think your ex is making a huge mistake. If he still has feelings for you, he shouldn't be talking about you and the similarities the two of you share in front of his new love interest. Second, you might want to look at the reasons why you separated, and who actually made the choice to separate. Third, if he does still have feelings for you, maybe he's not ready for a new relationship just yet. Maybe that's why their relationship is "undefined."