What are your thoughts? My ex still wants me in his life because he cares about me. When we...

Elisbch · M

It's truly complicated, no doubt but 1 thing sticks out to me. His talking about you to his new GF. If he didn't have feelings for you, I don't think he would be doing that. That may not make sense to you but coming from this male's point of view, I know that can happen.. Exactly what his feelings are is guess work unless you can get him to talk honestly. Letting walls down maybe. Just because he's with someone else does not necessarily mean he still doesn't love you or have relationship desires with you. Feelings can be very complicated and many times not make sense but to only the person having them.
Of course I don't know any details but maybe your relationship with him just needs/needed more work, counseling maybe. Like I said, I don't know. Good luck navigating thru all this. It can be very difficult.

Docdon23 · M

For me, monogamy is the only way (others will disagree). I would kindly tell your ex it is over and we both need to move on, and for now that means not seeing each other or being in each other's lives. I certainly understand his new girlfriend being jealous. he also can't have it both ways, in my view.

TheOnlyTribalChiefRomanReigns · 56-60, M

It's terrible to still be in love with someone and they appear to be with someone else I know the feeling it really hurts but what can we do not much and never be ashamed to say your still in love with a ex because it happened to me but in my case we ended up in court that ended things for both of us.

LadyGrace · 70-79

Truthfully, that sounds like a recipe for disaster. What their relationship is, I don't think you should be concerned about. This triangle will never work and I think you're interfering. You're right. He's not in love with you or he wouldn't be with that other lady. I think it's best to move on.

powernap · 56-60, M

First of all, I think your ex is making a huge mistake. If he still has feelings for you, he shouldn't be talking about you and the similarities the two of you share in front of his new love interest. Second, you might want to look at the reasons why you separated, and who actually made the choice to separate. Third, if he does still have feelings for you, maybe he's not ready for a new relationship just yet. Maybe that's why their relationship is "undefined."

Bang5luts · M

You have to do what is right for you. I don't think I could remain friends myself. Not if the break up was recent like within the first year or so. Especially if zi still had wavering feelings for him.

If she (his new found love) is like you, why weren't you good enough for him? I guess that would be on my mind.

I am friends with one of my ex's but only one.

iamBen · 61-69, M

Communicate, set boundaries, value the parts of what you share and keep it to that. Jealousy comes from feeling vulnerable. It's on him to make certain you are not a source of her vulnerability. As a start, he should stop talking about you. Yeesh.

HobNoblin · 36-40, M

Don't be hanging around exes ,talking to them, acknowledgeing they exist. That's if you want a relationship to actually work. Other than that, you're all on your own.

DareToSayIT · 31-35, M

Remember the reason why he was an ex. That reason never goes away. He has moved on with another woman and any rift in their relationship isn’t your problem.

He’s the complicated one. Stay away.

SStarfish ·

I think he's playing both of you trying to hang onto you and f with her but not be committed to her.. he's using her and trying to stay attached to you. It's not right ..

Elaaaa · 16-17, F

I'm having the same problem except my ex doesn't have a gf

JamesBugman · 56-60, T

Every time you talk to him, meet with him, email or communicate with him you make this worse. You have to sever all ties. It will not end up well for anyone if you continue down this path.
Do him a favour and stop connecting with him. He cannot be your "friend".

YourMomsSecretCrush · M

ya'll still have alot of unresolved feelings. but, you wont ever completely get over someone with them still close in your life. either get back together or completely break. the in between is what drives you insane.