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How do you know when your old?

How do you know you've hit the stage where your finally old....
When being able to find the tums is the best thing ever at the moment.
It's 1230... I want to be sleeping and I'm needing tums... What has happened in my life that this feels too late and grease has me needing tums....
Anyone else or just me?
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You feel old at your age? Cripes. Wait until you become senior! Tums are a temporary solution. Stop taking them. Develop some good eating habits. That or you will either develop an ulcer or need your gall bladder removed. Easy choice.