thoughts about suicide?

I had about year or so a while back during which I was very suicidal and experiencing a lot of self-harm urges as well. This was at the apex of my battle with depression. I was later diagnosed with Complex PTSD (PTSD pertaining to childhood trauma) and chronic anxiety. Essentially what was happening to me is that certain subliminal signals in my life were continuously triggering my PTSD, and sending me into what I call 'anxious states'. These anxious states were a sort of mental analog of a fight or flight state, basically my whole brain and nervous system was constantly in overdrive. At first this caused me all sorts of dissociative issues as my psyche tried to escape itself because it was tired of being stuck in an over-alert brain and body. If the anxious states lasted long enough, my subconscious would eventually give up on dissociating, and instead become suicidal. I think this is kind of logical in a certain way, since my psyche basically just needs to end its state of over-stressed fight-or-flight terror in any way possible, so when dissociating stops working, then it turns to something more drastic.

What fixed it was making sure I noticed when I slipped into an anxious state, then using various techniques to get out of it so that it didn't come to suicide, and also addressing the PTSD triggers in my life.