Retirement !!! (For present and future retirees)

Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday



Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.


Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb? < /span>
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day..



Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.


Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10% discount.


Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.


Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.


Question: What is the common term for a senior who still works and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!


Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there. Or move back in there . . .


Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal ...


Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer: The never ending Coffee Break.


Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.


Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he worked with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.



And, my very favorite....
QUESTION: What do you do all week?
Answer: Monday through Friday, NOTHING..... Saturday & Sunday, I rest.