I have plans

I’ve been planning my death for sometime now.

I smile every day.
I do everything expected of me.
Secretly, I’m tired and hollow.
I move and speak on autopilot. I see life in shades of grey with fleeting flickers of colour.

I have family responsibilities to take care of first.
These commitments may keep me alive for months or years, but once they are over I will go. There will be nobody affected by my death, my passing will do no harm.

I’m posting this here because it’s anonymous, and I want to say this out loud at least once.