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I overdosed today and was nearing an end

I was drowsy at the first when i had lot of alprazolam and clonazepam and then i felt numbness in my brain like the pain is gone, i felt i was floating on the clouds and my body got cold, my feet were cold, later I started shivering, my chest burnt and there was tightness, my stomach pained a lot and i don't recall what i was talking because i was partially unconscious.

Thanks to @JSmith75 @thewindupbirdchronicles @NeoNeo for saving me, talking to me in that partially unconscious state, for pushing me to call for the ambulance.

They put some pipe in my mouth and i tasted salt water and I threw up alprazolam and clonazepam. I lost a lot of water and i was kept on IV.

I was 30-40 minutes away from losing my life and it is only because of you
@thewindupbirdchronicles that i am alive. You reminded me of my niece and how much i love her that I started coming back to senses.

My American friend Dan from SW who was in my country recently kept calling me but my mouth was numb to speak. He said he will come again and hug me and punish me by taking away my phone and computer.

I slept in the hospital for 4 hours during the day and they made me meet a psychiatrist. I couldn't smile, i could not tell her because i was numb, i was shutdown from within and i forgot how to cry.

I have thought of hurting myself in past but i never ever attempted it because no one pushed me so far. I don't want to ever talk about what made me do it or who. Never ask me. Never remind me.

I am still on bed rest because i still have the drowsiness.

I am truly sorry to those friends who wrote on my post. I am still not fine but i didn't want to ghost out and scare you.

Thank you for giving me a new life. I will value it.
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WHAT? I'm relieved you are ok, but...wow.
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@SW-User I'm sorry you felt pushed to that.

Knowing when to weight someone else's opinion as 0 is important. You can never control everyone else...the only thing you really have any chance of controlling is your own reaction to whatever happens.

If you give in to mean, evil ppl...you are giving THEM the power over you. And some are sociopaths who wouldn't care about your death, and others woukd exult in their power.

Take back that power. Realize that you can reject nonsense. Reject the overly-harsh as having an evil intent. ...namaste.
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@SW-User ...seriously? Anyone awake & paying attention knows that. lol

It's why I want to name my next dog "Nama"...so when I train her, I can say, "Nama, stay."
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@SW-User
I tell people they have an equal share in inherent worth as children of God.
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@SW-User Well, I am glad you have decided to remain amongst the living, for a bit. And glad to make you smile on such a day.
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@SW-User Then I am very honored!
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