He had to go 🖤

Lost to reality in an instant, I was looking down upon his stricken face. His eyes regretful, understanding, the light behind them quickly dimming. He didn’t want to let go, not really, as he faded away he began searching. I could see he saw inside my heart. He knew the truth. That I loved him madly. That he threw it away and his gifts, his music, all were leaving this life. He thought he had nothing but he truly had it all. And I felt him too. He loved me as best he was able, but he was far gone when we met. So I don’t feel guilt. Nor anger. Just love. I have peace that he knows what was in my heart. I ache to touch him. To kiss his lips. But I never will. My last memory will be of the moment of relief on his face when he saw I could be with him. That I love him and always will.

He was no good for me. I couldn’t of saved him without being destroyed. But I loved him. I still love him. He just had to go.