Social awkwardness

I’ve come to realize just how socially awkward I really am. I overthink conversations, worry about how I’m coming across, and sometimes have absolutely no idea what to say or how to keep a conversation going. It’s especially difficult when I actually like someone or care about their opinion of me.

The weird thing is, once I’m comfortable with someone, I can be funny, playful, and completely myself. It’s getting past that initial wall that’s difficult. I think spending so much time alone and going through everything I’ve been through has made me more withdrawn and uncomfortable around people.

I’m not antisocial because I don’t want connection. Sometimes I think I want connection so badly that I don’t know how to handle it when it’s actually in front of me.