So how’s everyone

Went for a walk
Mom motivated me to go and I felt a lot better
Strange how I forgot something so simple that a walk can change my feelings.
I think stress caused me to forget maybe
But home alone.
Being alone scares me sometimes

Anyway I went to the shops earlier
My panic attacks in public are getting worse
Like I’m too scared to go into two specific supermarkets as I had a full blown anxiety pan I’ve meltdown in one and then the other on a different day.

But today I went into one of them. I made it quick. Got basics no eye contact.
I felt my chest go super tight my forehead area go sore.
Like I was being radiated by some heat source

Now I’m home even though this is where I wanted to be
I feel deep feelings of loneliness

I think it should get better. I’m trying to stay Patient. There are a couple of things on the horizon that I know will change the game

I will be getting a car soon but this month or next
It will be January. Long wait

Also some home changes. But mainly the car will change how I feel I think. Then (because I live out in the countryside) I think getting in my car going to see people I love will be so much easier.

being · 36-40, F

Living in the countryside can be wonderful..
But then you grow sensitive (a good and healthy thing imo) to the lights, vibrations, odours of big markets.
The car sounds def like a game changer. Hold on there. Consider daily little walks..

Lilnonames · F

I like riding in old country roads just looking around, look at the cows and horses, old farm buildings old cars the scenery...