Pretend that there is a title

Sometimes i feel like im only living for the of the people around me like i dont really feel like im living my life for ME yk? Like everyday i i bottle up my emotions so my friends dont worry (didn't say parents bc they wouldn't give a rats ass if i was dead or alive) I've always hid my emotions but i think its really starting to get to me. Sometimes cry and get mad over the smallest things like someone tapping their pen repeatedly on their desk in class. I've also noticed that my thoughts r getting darker. That with it being a week before Christmas break and my grades r absolute shit i feel like giving up.