Grieving comes In weird ways!

The last week I been numb and one day I am so sleepy and sleep so much and then last night I couldn’t sleep and when I did doze off I was having nightmares.

I don’t feel I have closure or can grieve the way I want to as I Havant done the funeral yet as it’s next Tuesday and I am trying to hold myself together but I can feel the pain heavy in my heart.

I guess I’m scare to cry because it feels like I’m going to die so I have shut down something I have become good at but I know this is having a huge impact on my mental health.

I dreamt of my dad the other night he seemed happier I just hope he is and I hope his not angry with me for not being able to help him.

I’m hurting but I’m scared to let go it’s a weird feeling!

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bijouxbroussard · F

I’m coming up on the first anniversary of my mother’s passing. It still feels unreal, like she’s just away and will eventually return, even though intellectually I know otherwise. Sometimes I can think about it dispassionately, other times I break down and feel overwhelmed with loss.

I’ve experienced other losses (husband, son) and worked through that, and I’ve come to understand it becomes like a dull ache in the back of one’s heart. You experience joy again, you find you can remember them and smile. My father, siblings and I have already been able to discuss Mom’s wonderful sense of humor and even laugh. 🥹

LittleTinks

@bijouxbroussard bless ya I know that pain of losing a mum I lost mine 11 years ago and omg the main I experienced was awful and I just shut down shut the pain off think that’s why I won’t accept it and fully embrace it now as I couldn’t cope back then and worried I will have a full blown melt down.

Wow you have had a lot of loss I am so sorry but glad you can look back on good memories that’s lovely and your mum is always with you just ask her for a sign! Ask for a white dove don’t know why that came to mind?