Shopping shouldn't have to be this insidious. I hate that it is...

I will be the first to admit I'm not the best at interacting with people. I can tell there is a formula to it, but I just can't seem to figure it out, at least not yet. Well, maybe I'm not good at it at all, but if that's the case, it's not really my fault. People should respect boundaries. I don't appreciate store employees "welcoming me in," greeting me with smiles and high fives, or acting like guided missiles to ask me if I want any help. And I don't think that can or should qualify me for social anxiety man of the month.

I never know what to say to these automatons who seem to specifically and especially target me for their venomous display of programmed hospitality. I usually have to spend half my time at least, trying to shop in stealth mode to avoid their gaze. If there are other shoppers who want to be drawn into their web of greeting, they should reach out to them and leave me in peace. It really has become quite a harrowing experience just walking into any random store, on any random day, trying to do any kind of random shopping.