Have you ever felt past the point of healing...

@JoyfulSilence Thanks Joyful, it's kind of you to give ideas how to just really relax about it all. 🪻 I get so caught up in how I'll most likely be rejected after a couple meetups that I do forget, others have issues and maybe *I* won't like THEM. Or, like you said, they might just be patient with me, kind and caring. Not judging me on my issues like I feel most could. Thanks again...it's just really a short meetup and not a big event.
There's still someone out there for you regardless if other women have not worked out. You were just accepting and kind to me , and didn't only talk on and on like you think you did. So people out there will enjoy that. Some talking with some caring. 🌻 Maybe a few people didn't click but there's so many people out there, that someone will click and someone for you. Again I appreciate your ideas and positivity Joyful 🌼

@Coralmist

You are welcome.

As for me, I should mention that at this point in my life, it no longer matters to me that much (meeting someone). Not that it ever did too much.

Some people feel pressured by family or tradition to meet somebody, get married, and have kids. Not me. Meeting somebody could be nice, and if she and I like each other a few years, she and I might as well get married. I bet there are legal benefits, too. Unless she and I get divorced and she wants half my money, LOL! 😁

My parents always wanted more grandchildren, but they will have to live with the disappointment. And even if I suddenly wanted some I would need a young wife, which is unlikely, or adopt. But I am not interested either way.

I am quite independent, and if I need help I have credit cards. 😁 What I really need is a maid since I hate doing chores!

When I was young, lust was a big driver. I still have never shared intimate space with a woman. But as I have aged my brain must be less bathed in those chemicals. And parts no longer work well. And illness has had its impact. I bet all the drugs do not help, either. I do not think about lust much anymore. I feel sad at times, but it is nice to not be distracted so much like when I was young.

Of course, the primary drive is to cure loneliness. But there are still people to talk to, rather than hold. Of course people can be annoying, too! 😁

I feel rather stable and even a little content now. The only stress in my life is my job, which can get busy, and my failing health, which is still not too bad. As long as my diabetes does not progress.

My favorite passtime is thinking, which I can still do well!

@JoyfulSilence I really don't feel pressure to date or marry, but watching everyone else enjoy intimacy and love for years, while you believe you're not enough for it, feels devastating sometimes. I long for it everyday, for years, Bec I believed it couldn't be for me. That Bec I have so many issues, I am not a true candidate. Which makes you hope even a little, year after year, that somehow you can conquer it. But the anxiety is very embedded. It's beyond hard trying to heal this. But I won't stop I just can't.

@Coralmist

Never lose hope!