About 12 years ago, we built a new house in the country. Neighbours are close but not too close. And we get alot of snow in the winter. (See where this is going yet?) I had a jeep with a plow on it and enjoyed being neighbourly and would plow the neighbours whenever it snowed as a gesture of good will. Then I bought a tractor with blower and continued to be neighbourly. I never got a penny from one neighbour while the the other neighbour brought a couple micro jars of jam over with a small gift card for home depot.
Couple of years ago, the tractor started developing issues and was expensive to fix. Its still temperamental and I told the neighbours that I couldnt do their driveways for them anymore.
Well…every time it snows, my phone rings and they don’t take no for an answer. I feel guilty and end up doing it for them.
How do i say no? So that they understand?
(I wasn’t awake yet this morning and my phone was already ringing.)
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I would just say sorry, I cannot help you anymore. My tractor is not in good shape. Repeat. Repeat.
I just want to add 2 comments. I live and I have lived in the country. Neighbours treat each other as good family. I borrow from them in a pinch. They do the same. It varies from neighbor to neighbor too.
You speak even negatively of getting " micro" jars of jam. That makes me wonder about how you treat people. If one foes someyhkng kind, then do it for kindness not for reciprocity. Or gifts.
I used to shovel my elderly neighbour's sidewalk and driveway. He was in his 80's. Would never ask for help. He was proud. Independent. Just do for others. Someday you will need help. Let's hope someone is kind to you.
@PoetryNEmotion My neighbour helped me to get my car started last winter in the freezing cold so my wife insisted I give him a gift certificate. He gave it back, mildly offended saying that he does not expect anything, we are friends and neighbours and cited a week I shoveled his driveway when he had a heart attack (which I didn't even remember doing).
@PoetryNEmotion No. I wasn’t being negative.’ The 2 micro jars of jam are just that. 1litre jars are large. 500 ml jars are small. 250 ml jars are mini. And 125 ml jars are micro. You can’t get smaller canning jars than 125ml. Maybe I shoulda said ‘125 ml jars of jam’ instead of micro jars.
I never expected anything from either neighbour…just appreciation. I was merely trying to point out that in all these years, (YEARS), the one neighbour has not been offered a cup of coffee let alone a jug of fuel or tube of grease. And I still was there whenever it snowed.
I appreciate your comments as it made me question my prerogative as to why I did their driveways in the first place. Thank you.
I should have mentioned that both neighbours are capable of doing their own driveways. One has a four-wheeler with a plow while the other has a newer snowblower.
@LunarOrbit Hmmm...This is not ending well. The jams were small. My neighbors have given me jars from micro to large with homemade foodstuffs like jams, relish, etc. They could say thank you. Older folks are proud. They find saying thank you hard, I find. You seem a bit harsh. I am happy I am not your neighbour. I would not ask you for anything. Geez. It is good you live in the country. Less people.
@PoetryNEmotion Pardon? You don’t need to insult anyone in an effort to validate your view. Not everyone thinks like you. And seeing you are the only person following this thread that thinks I’m the problem, should make you look in the mirror and question *your* opinion. Have a lonely day.
