I feel like a nobody
I feel like I'm past the point of expiration. As if I wasn't meant to live past a certain point yet I'm still here.
Everything I do, feel or think seems totally pointless and just feel tired.
I'm all alone I don't have friends & even if I did I suck at keeping friendships mostly because I'm paranoid they're around me out of pity & not because they like me. I mean I have my family but I only feel like a total burden on them and honestly I always felt like I annoyed them since I was a child so I doubt they like me very much.
Not only that, lately I can't seem to control my irritability & my reactions because of that make me come off as angry all the time.
The only thing I'm truly mad at is myself for being so useless. I can't even get a job because I can't handle stress or anxiety.
It's either be at home feeling pointless like nothing or be at a job & have suicidal thoughts all the time. I'd rather feel nothing to be honest.
I can't tell anyone about what stress/anxiety does to me because I feel like they're gonna keep me under watch all the time which would absolutely suck since I like being alone most of the time.
****Before anyone tells me to get help, I'm not suicidal and I already take medication. I tried therapy but I didn't like it & didn't really help me. I'm just in a state of hating who I am right now & just feeling tired.
Everything I do, feel or think seems totally pointless and just feel tired.
I'm all alone I don't have friends & even if I did I suck at keeping friendships mostly because I'm paranoid they're around me out of pity & not because they like me. I mean I have my family but I only feel like a total burden on them and honestly I always felt like I annoyed them since I was a child so I doubt they like me very much.
Not only that, lately I can't seem to control my irritability & my reactions because of that make me come off as angry all the time.
The only thing I'm truly mad at is myself for being so useless. I can't even get a job because I can't handle stress or anxiety.
It's either be at home feeling pointless like nothing or be at a job & have suicidal thoughts all the time. I'd rather feel nothing to be honest.
I can't tell anyone about what stress/anxiety does to me because I feel like they're gonna keep me under watch all the time which would absolutely suck since I like being alone most of the time.
****Before anyone tells me to get help, I'm not suicidal and I already take medication. I tried therapy but I didn't like it & didn't really help me. I'm just in a state of hating who I am right now & just feeling tired.
