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Suicidal people and how they leave people around them feeling guilty

I have a friend that I've known for years now, ever since I met her she's been sad, depressed and needy.

At first I thought I'd listen to her, care for her and be there for her whenever she needed, it went on for about 2 years, I spent days and nights listening to her endless nags and whines about everything and everyone, it damaged myself too since I've been struggling with depression but I don't talk about it.

After that many days and years I finally noticed that this is the pattern of her behavior, she doesn't try at all to get better not one single effort did she make, I also realized the reason behind her behavior but I won't go into those details.

After that I used covid quarantines as an excuse to stay away from her and her negative energies but then she started attempting suicide, saying nobody cared about her and with that I fell in her circle of depression plus now suicidal thoughts.
Ngl it took me again a while to notice it was her new method to get attention. After that I began ignoring her more.

Till a few days ago she texted me and said "hey Nano I don't feel good at all" which I ignored, today she called me, she had a confused and tired tone, told me she's hospitalized because she attempted suicide......

Now it wasn't my fault, I had 10000 reasons for staying away from her, she ruined more than 2 years of my life (I know it was my own fault too)
But guilt is knocking at my door.... "if u replied to her text it might've been prevented"
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Mooed78 · F
I know it’s hard. You have to protect yourself and your mental health too.
Nanori · F
@Mooed78 I was stupid for taking responsibility for her wellbeing to begin with
Mooed78 · F
@Nanori No not at all.. you did your best to help her. You have been a good friend to her..now you need to take care of yourself 🥰❤️