Instead of the urge to fly off the handle first thing, sounds odd, but you can actually practice anger management and how you respond to a situation, "in the moment" you get angry. You'll know when you're getting angry, so work on better communication at that time. Try it out and you'll see firsthand, that it really isn't necessary to scream or yell, in order for someone to hear you. Keep your voice down, and people will be more willing to hear what you have to say. Scream, and right away they'll get defensive. It was also cut down on your time and trying to get your point across. Try using different words like, "When you do (or say) that, that makes me feel _______________." With this tactic, you're not attacking the person, but getting right to the point you wish to make, which is, they are making you feel a certain way. Talk about how it makes you feel, over attacking the person. Some people just don't realize when they are hurting your feelings. And even if they do, still use that tactic because this way you're getting to the root of the problem. You are effectively letting that person know that what they are doing affects you in the wrong way. And if they are a friend at all, they will immediately stop the action which is upsetting you. It's all in the way you communicate and the tone of your voice. You can keep things at a healthy level by keeping your head, speaking in a respectful way without raising your voice, and at the same time, helping them understand that what they are doing is hurtful. Try it. I think you will like the results much better and then both parties are not angry at each other. If each will only speak to the other with respect, it will make all the difference in the world. You can even practice what you will say to someone in private so you won't have the urge to get off track when speaking in person. Remember to treat them like you would want to be treated and talked to. I used to tell my abusive husband, "Yell at me, and I can't hear you. Talk to me as a human being, and I'm all ears."
