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Is this too big of an age gap?

I think my manager is interested in me, he makes it really obvious.. he treats me different than everyone else, the only thing is he's 36 and I'm 19. Is that too crazy? I didn't know his age until today... he looks like 28
SW-User
it's not the age gap that bothers me... workplace relationships never work out.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
Really.. I know a lot of people that date coworkers or still are dating... some of the longest relationships that my friends are in right now met at work
Peaceful · F
I wouldn't date someone that was my superior. Dangerous move.
Peaceful · F
If you don't have the time to figure you out, you don't have the time to date. I'm being serious.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
I know who I am I've just always had a hard time choosing things or deciding between equally good choices
Peaceful · F
ok
mickeygrey · 70-79, M
My wife is 11 years younger than me. When we got together she was 32 and I was 43. Not nearly the gap you're looking at, but nonetheless we had a few issues. I was past certain things and she still wanted to be in the middle of it. As we aged we began to come more inline with one another. Good luck if you decide to do it. If you do I think you'll like dating an older man. We are typically more patient and we certainly take our time making love.
SW-User
The bottom line is how you feel about this. Understand work place relationships are the worst because when things go sour in the relationship it goes sour at work.
My advice is not to do it.
SW-User
@TheFlowerThatBloomsInAdversity: I wish the very best for you, what ever you decide to do.
Please know if you have any questions I'll be glad to help you anyway I can.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
Okay thank you
SW-User
You're welcome.
RemovedUsername3752 · 46-50, M
I'm 41 and have a 19 and 17 year old lover. They have pursued me by the way.
So the age issue isn't as major as the fact that this guy is your Manager. That kind of relationship is a bad one to get into. If the relationship were to end bad, then one or both of you will end up fired. If he was to fire you, then that opens up a sexual harassment case. And most companies will cover their ass and terminate him for the improper relationship and you for attendance or sales numbers or whatever they could come up with.
RemovedUsername3752 · 46-50, M
@Laifu1: Its a sordid situation. I do get tested though. I don't know the 19 yr olds folks but I'm sure they wouldn't be to understanding either. I keep telling myself I am going to stop but then they call me, or come over. The one likes to call me and tell me to look out the window as they stand in their room and take off their clothes to tease me.
TheCapedCrusader007 · 36-40, M
@Laifu1: 19 17 both are creepy. And those girls needed to be slapped to their senses.
SW-User
@TheCapedCrusader007: I agree. But to be fair, the one is technically an adult. A stupid adult, but still an adult.
SW-User
thats a big age gap but you both are adults its more based on how well you two match. my friend is 32 and he is dating an 18 year old. they get along well. their personality work well together. its also dangerous with him being your boss. if something happens you might lose your job or might make your work more difficult.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
How much is my job actually worth though lol
SW-User
i have no clue. is the pay okay? if you really want to go out on a couple of dates and see how things go
Summergirly · 26-30, F
Minimum wage? You know me lol
Cooper802Forever · 22-25, M
Hmmm...well it is quite a gap that could come to surprise others like friends or family...but if you're interested I don't see why not, I mean there is a chance your manager just wants a fling with you and not anything deep. Still who knows you can decide who you date and stuff...like I don't find it bad per say, just like a little woah, but if I was your friend I'd be like that's your thing and I'm fine with it I guess...
Danez · M
The age difference isn't (or shouldnt be) a big deal. If you get along ok and seem to have similar interests then just think of things in that way. I met someone that is 27 and I'm 55 that we just enjoy doing the same things and enjoy hanging out with each other. So enjoy but take things slow so that things don't get weird at work.
Groofydorkgerdo · 56-60, M
I can't say anything, my wife is 18years older than me, and she is soon moving out. She informed me just before disappearing for a weak or so.
I invited a friend over to see the place to see if she would move in and help with the rent.
She was kinda playful and she is 22years younger.
So I really don't know.
SW-User
I think it's up to YOU and him...no-one else. However, be prepared for comments from all the folks in your life who will feel it's their duty to share them with you.
calicuz · 51-55, M
No, I don't think so, just make sure he actually likes you and isn't just trying to hit it and quit it.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
He might be but I don't let anyone hit it
calicuz · 51-55, M
@TheFlowerThatBloomsInAdversity: 👊🏽
SW-User
I would find out your company's rules on fraternization first. When I was your age I dated several older men. In my experience, most of them were looking for something very different from what I was looking for in life. However, that is simply my experience. If you like him then age is just a number.
SW-User
@TheFlowerThatBloomsInAdversity: Well, first problem was sex. They were old enough that it was an expected part of dating for them. I still wanted to only sleep with someone I loved and take my time. Second was the ones who seemed to want a wife and family immediately. It is a bit awkward when your bf brings his son on the first date... I was overwhelmed. Third was different goals in life. I wanted to finish school and travel, while they cared about job security and mortgage payments.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
I feel like I'm in the same place as you with only wanting to sleep with someone that I love, not wanting to have a family, and wanting to finish school and travel. Damn.
Although he rarely dates, has never been married or had any kids, and he travels all the time and goes on adventures... that's more of what I'm into
SW-User
@TheFlowerThatBloomsInAdversity: Then you may not have any issues. You tend to find these things out within a couple of dates. I think that gaps that big are often problematic, but there are always exceptions.
Datdudeblack · 36-40, M
never good to date someone from work. especially someone higher up. go out on a date and youll see if the age gap is a problem.
Coppercoil · M
When I was 20 I dated a 37 year old. She looked younger too. I mean I was turned on by her so I just went for it. I won't say it was effortless.. you will catch hell from your peers and their peers will not be uber supportive either. But it can work. We made ot last for 5 years. But if there isn't a serious connection, don't bother, too much trouble.
Tatsumi · 31-35, M
The socially acceptable age that men can date is half their age + 7. So, for a 36 year old, it would be 25. So yeah. That's an age gap that would probably receive negative attention from society. But, while it's not socially acceptable, ultimately it's up to you. You're a legal adult.
SW-User
Interesting. What's socially acceptable for women?
Age, not an issue.
Working in same business, issue.
totalrandoman · 100+, M
The age gap is a socially constructed taboo for guiding relationships. Try it out and figure it out for your own. Everyone is attracted to youth. He will certainly appreciate it.
Don't do it ,you're way to old for him
I'd say 16 max ,be careful off him
Summergirly · 26-30, F
Woah lol i thought you were saying I was looking old and ugly 😂 I'll take 16 lol
But no really I'm 19 and I'll be careful
id never say such a thing 😋
xmedleft · 51-55, M
As long as you're both adults and as long as you're both OK with it...
I'd be more concerned that this is a work relationship.
LuciferMorningstar · 56-60, M
Ive dated 18 years younger. I was 47 and she was 29. Ultimately, it didnt work. We are still close. We didn't meet at work though.
SW-User
Ultimately, it depends on whether you have anything in common..
Summergirly · 26-30, F
Very true
missit15 · 56-60, M
its a big age difference. I wouldnt recommend it but souls dont see age or color...
This comment is hidden. Show Comment
496sbc · 36-40, M
Nope its ok in my book. I say go for it girl.
Summergirly · 26-30, F
Haha coming from a dude his age
becca00f · 22-25, F
If you like him then dont let your ages stop you
TheCapedCrusader007 · 36-40, M
Depends. what are you looking for?
Alexsw · 70-79, M
no go head
Summergirly · 26-30, F
I might just continue the "flirtationship" and not do anything about it lol
Alexsw · 70-79, M
@TheFlowerThatBloomsInAdversity: ok
SW-User
Big yes but go for it to see how it is.
SW-User
you have my blessing
LachrymoseLamer · 51-55, M
Just be careful, ok?
Kingfish · 31-35, M
Go for it.

 
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