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I'm really trying to figure out my friendships around here

And I conclude to what I have overheard, two older male friends saying, back in Greece... they were saying in a general context that "we (men) have scared them (women), look at them and how they're worried" ..so I find this to be true now, I see how I am scared of men. How i am double guessing their intentions. Should I trust, should I not trust? It's a question that's coming up again this evening.

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riseofthemachine · 41-45, M

I'm a man and ever since i was a ternager i never trusted men . I went back time and time again thinking it be different and all i got was pain . Im not gay and what im saying is about friendships . Im 41 now and i prefet being on my own .
I was in a few relationships with woman and everyone of those woman cheated on , so i don't trust woman either .
I'm single now 13 years and i can tell you i went through a lot in those 13 years , people given me all wrong information, then hurting me and going back to them and then getting hurt again by mostly men , ended up in a pysche ward a fee times over it , the bullying for 13 years went beyond words , trauma don't even come close to it , so my advice go with your instincts cause a friend said to me , going back to them and expecting different results is insanity, so if you get hurt once , leave that as a lesson .

Carazaa · F

@riseofthemachine So sorry about your past pain.😥

LadyGrace · 70-79

Trust is earned. Nobody knows firsthand. You watch and listen, that's all. Don't ignore the red flags when or if they come up. Don't let them cross your personal boundaries. And stay away from controlling people. You know what you like and don't like. A good person will treat you the way you want to be treated. If they don't, walk away, real quick.

Coppercoil · M

Its a problem that has been with us since humanity started. The other day i was thinking.. maybe the best part of being a guy is i can go anywhere anytime day or night, with only shorts on no tshirt even and no one will bother me. In any way really. But this just isnt a thing women can do. Of course all this is compounded by the fact you are in another country, police or no police service is a ? And the populous speaks another language, you dont have places you know are safe, friends and family around, you dont know the culture or even those people of a similar culture around you, so my only question for you is, why wouldn't you be nervous and suspicious? I mean? Doesnt that seem to be a natural response for being where you are right now?

Unlearn · 41-45, M

Listen to your instincts...

being · 36-40, F

@Unlearn my instincts are confused

ABCDEF7 · M

Not all men are same.

Being a friend you might have seen me posting this before.

Trust only when you are ready to become vulnerable, not when you want others to act as per your expectations.

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ABCDEF7 · M

@being Then I suggest, you need to be double sure. Sometimes getting vulnerable is not the right option for your integrity. I feel your integrity as a woman and as an individual establishes the basis for you to live with peace, joy and dignity. Integrity is of paramount importance for any individual.

No, you clearly doesn't seems to ready with your words.

being · 36-40, F

@ABCDEF7 so doesn't trusting means also, knowing whom to trust ? Trust in your ability to recognise whom to trust ?
Or is trust a value that changes everything around it when truly truly present ?

I guess, doesn't matter how fancy my questions, they're mere questions. I will see how I will handle this. Now I need to get some rest:)

ABCDEF7 · M

@being Trusting is surely getting vulnerable. It's in your favor to know and understand them before you get vulnerable.

On their part, it's the responsibility. So you need to be sure if they are really capable of the responsibility.

Take rest,

and all the best !

Miram · 31-35, F

Don't trust

being · 36-40, F

@Miram okay that's the safest. But you know... that's only confirming the fear. I am aware there is such a thin line over there

Miram · 31-35, F

@being It shouldn't be out of fear. It should be a logical response to keep one's best interest first.

We can only raise the young to do better. All else is less in control

Justenjoyit · 61-69, M

You can trust me I am a Lawyer

LadyGrace · 70-79

@Justenjoyit So was my abusive ex. I hope she doesn't fall for that line.

Justenjoyit · 61-69, M

@LadyGrace

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