It is just me, or do the majority of people who accuse others of being a "narcissist", or having "red flags" tend to be pretty negative people?

Bitter, unsuccessful, mentally ill and so on.

I've never known a positive, successful person who wishes for those around them to succeed to also tell me about how this and that person is a "narcissist" or had so and so "red flag". Instead, they wish to bring out the good in people. Which in extension allows them to bring out the good in themselves.

Whilst with the "narcissist/red flag" labellers, on the other hand - they seem to just have this negative outlook about themselves and everyone else. One where even the good things become a negative, and everything in their life is sucked down into destruction and negativity - and it's everyone else's fault. It isn't, these other people are positive and succeeding, which is where the "narcissist" label comes in, for them to deny reality, creating this destructive cycle for themselves.

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Mordechai · 31-35, M

So 1. It's often misuse of diagnostic language due to the normalisation of pop psychology
2. Genuine narcissists are actually rare, everyone displays "narcissistic" behaviours sometimes, it's about consistency, clusters of behaviour, and the underlying reasons for it.
3. People are most vulnerable in relationships, attachment styles and communication issues come out more and people think the worst of eachother eg. Everyone's ex is "a narcissist" because they seemed very selfish and left them feeling hurt.

Therealsteve · 31-35, M

@Mordechai It's good to finally see someone of whom is honest and logical in this area. What you said is true (I am actually a mental health professional) and it's great that you didn't jump on the bandwagon of "but but my ex's REALLY were narcissists". It's a rare, neurodevelopmental and sociobiological condition, and it's weird that despite making up less than 5% of the population, everyone and their mother apparently is one. It's a good way for people to devalue others - even their achievements make them a bad person because now they are a "narcissist".